Lester picked me up at my house for our date. He didn't come to my door, instead opting to sit in his car and honk his horn.
When we made it to the riverside restaurant, we both stepped out of the car. When I walked over to join him, I noticed his sack hanging out of his fly.
"Dear God—" I began.
He looked down, said, "Oh!" and stuffed himself back into his pants. "I was airing them out in the car before I picked you up. Well, now you've met the super intergalactic wrinkle brothers."
In retrospect, I can't believe I let us do dinner and even kiss after that. Every time I thought of him afterward, I imagined his "brothers" just hanging out. We even went on a second date, but that was the last one.
What a coincidence, this exact same subject came up just last weekend. I was a guest at a delightful dinner party hosted by the illustrious architect and daring marine biologist Art Vandelay and his sexy gorgeous model wife Dr Victoria Zdrok. Art was in very good spirits considering his recent kidnapping by that shrill law firm office cleaner, and here's the coincidence.
ReplyDeleteTowards the end of the ordeal just prior to his rescue the kidnapper, who for some reason would change out of her blue collar overalls into a business suit after work, would occasionally have one testicle hanging out of her panties. At least that's what Art swears. I asked if it could, by any remote possibility, be a swollen labia. Nope, and we just laughed and laughed.
Hey OP, how does it feel to be a dinner whore?
ReplyDeleteHope he didn't have vinyl seats! Peeling those sweaty bad boys off of hot plastic would be painful.
This exact same thing happened to me about a year ago. I was driving to a first date on a hot day and being a woman with a substantial labia I though it prudent to air them out in the car prior, you know, to maintain freshness. Anyway, I forgot to tuck those bad girls back in and it all got rather embarrassing on the after dinner walk when the wind picked up and they started whistling.
ReplyDeleteI sometimes wish this exact same thing would happen on a few more dates so you can see what you're getting. Let me explain.
ReplyDeleteI was newly dating a rather charming gentleman about six months ago who as it turns out had a very substantial ball sack. When it was time for some action, in one position when I was attempting to take him deep in my mouth, it suddenly turned into the face hugger scene in the movie Alien. It was a very tense breakfast the next day I can tell you.