Bounce 'n Roll

(Sequels. Are they a good thing? Click here to find out on Jared's Inkwell! -JMG)

Story Sent in by Eric:

Beth and I met in college, although I forget precisely how. What I remember is that she loved this one pizza place across the street from campus, so we went there for our first date.

Pizza went great (I can't imagine how anything involving pizza couldn't go well) and it was still early when we were done, so we took a nice long walk.

During the walk, she made a phone call. I could tell she was talking to a guy, and she told whoever it was precisely where we were and that he should meet us there. When she hung up, I asked her, "Was that a classmate?"

"Sorta, yeah," was her response.

It wasn't just a classmate. As we hung around to wait for this guy, she became nervous. Her whole manner changed, and I couldn't help but become a bit nervous, myself. At first I thought it was a student from one of her classes who maybe was going to pass some homework off to her or something. But that didn't fit how her mood had changed.

Two guys showed up. One of whom went right to her and ignored me completely, the other guy stood between Beth and I and folded his arms like he was some kind of bouncer at an exclusive club.

Neither man spoke to me, but the guy with Beth, I gathered, was a guy she used to date. She still seemed pretty nervous, and he was whispering to her although I couldn't hear a word.

"We're on a date," I said, "Could you guys give us some privacy?"

The guy with Beth gave me the finger and kept talking to her. I wondered, almost aloud, why she had called them up and summoned them there in the first place, with everything having gone so well up until then.

I called campus police right there and told them that these two guys were harassing my date and I. The one talking to Beth said, "You did not just call campus police."

"I did. But by all means keep harassing us."

The bouncer hardly made a move the entire time. The guy with Beth took a few steps toward me, then said, "You're not even worth it," then said to the bouncer, "Let's go, Rich." The two of them fled.

Campus police showed up about two minutes later. I explained everything to them, and they went on their way. When I was finally alone with Beth again, she told me that she was going to return home by herself and that I should have a good night.

Needless to say, we never wound up on another date.


  1. Sounds like she has a dysfunctionally codependent, possibly abusive relationship with homeboy... sad, really... I blame her father.

  2. Note to daters: if your date picks up the phone and invites someone else to your date, the date is over and they clearly aren't into you. Then again, maybe I'm particularly cruel because I would have left when the 2 douchebags showed up. Drama bitch would have been on her own.

  3. I don't understand why so many people are willing to put up with their date behaving badly. If someone you barely know is licking your food, calling ex's, drinking your beverages,while making snide remarks,they are using you for a free meal, to make ex jealous or just plain nuts, why bother calling the cops or staying for the rest of the meal? This is a indicator you are not the one.

  4. I understand that this was unpleasant, but why would you call campus police to report that someone was harassing your date, when your date CALLED that person and told him to meet her at a specific place? I don't know what was up with her and the other guy, but she seemed to be in the situation voluntarily, so I'm not sure why you felt like it was reasonable to get the police involved.

  5. @ SmallCityGirl - Not always, she could be into threesomes.

  6. @TheArchitect - Him, her, and the two douchebags = more like a foursome. How many men are required before a *some becomes a gangbang?

  7. @Tourist - It's a gangbang when you run outta holes (doubling up doesn't count) and the men hafta wait turn.

  8. That's a good point Fizziks. When your orifices have reached capacity, it officially becomes a gangbang. Reminds me of the time I went to see this NASCAR race, but Daytona was a pornstar and 500 was not the number of laps around a track.

  9. It was the "Houston 500". Not that I know that or anything...
    A, uh, friend told me about it. Yes. That's the ticket.

  10. Damn! You're right! Got my pornstars confused. Good catch Nom.

  11. Epic fail not knowing your NASCAR. 500 is the number of MILES, not laps.

  12. Fizziks/The Architect, to me that has always been the main problem with women, not enough holes.

  13. @ R - Actually, you get the epic fail for knowing that information. I'm from the south and have seen what the average NASCAR fan looks like. Glad I'm not counted among their dubious ranks.

    @ TryN2Fly - Hello? That's what the ice pick is for, duh!


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