Maybe Because He WAS an Evil Maniac

Story Sent in by Kelley:

I met with Paul for our first date after a busy workday. All I wanted to do was put my hair down, relax, and have a good time with a pretty nice guy who I had met and spoken to online for a few weeks.

It was a warm summer day in late June, and our talk, at dinner, turned to summer plans. He was going on a cross-Europe trip and I would be working and touring beaches up and down the eastern seaboard.

Then, he asked, "Are you going to rock that black bikini?"

As it turned out, I did own a black bikini, but at the time, I just thought he was making casual, non-specific conversation, so I laughed and said, "Probably. I do own a black bikini."

"I know. I've seen pictures of you in it."

Good time was over. I didn't use any bikini pictures in my profile. The only place online that I had such pictures was Facebook, and my privacy settings would've made it impossible for him to have seen the pictures. He and I weren't Facebook friends, yet.

Trying to tamp down on my increasing panic, I asked him, "Where'd you see them?"

"Facebook," he said.

"But we're not Facebook friends."

He nodded. "I know, but I... thought about friending you before the date, so I found your profile, and–"

"But those photos aren't publicly displayed. I'm 100% sure. How did you see them?"

His turn to feel uncomfortable, but for all intents and purposes, he didn't appear to be feeling anything but smugness.

He explained, "Well, I found your dating profile online a few months ago, so I looked you up on Facebook around then and friended you with a made-up person who I said you went to college with."

It was a shock.

He went on, "Wasn't that smart? So I've seen all your pictures, but don't worry. I didn't obsess over them, or something."

Trying to remain casual, I tried to flatter him into giving me the information I wanted. "That was smart. Which one of my friends are you?"

He wagged his finger at me. "That would be telling, and I'm not going to give up on you so easy, ha ha ha ha ha!" He laughed like an evil maniac.

I replied, "I'll probably unfriend you."

"You can try!" and again, that evil maniac laugh.

It was too much. "Excuse me," I said, then slipped out of the booth and went straight home. I was afraid he'd try to follow me, but for the first time that evening, perhaps I had done something that actually shocked him into an uncomfortable place.

Needless to say, as soon as I arrived home, I used some simple deduction to figure out which friend he was, and I removed him from my list. I never heard from him again, but I won't soon forget the way he looked at me, or that evil, maniacal laughter.


  1. This guy was creepy. It's disturbing that tricking you was his immediate go-to place, and it was doubly weird of him to go to so much trouble to fake-friend you and then just admit it outright. Leaving the date immediately was the correct response.

    But, OP? If your private Facebook pictures are really private? First, they shouldn't be on Facebook, because Zuckerberg regards privacy as a quaint Victorian hangup of the masses. Second, you might not want to give access to 'old friends' you don't actually remember. It seems odd to me to simultaneously be so worried about your privacy and so casual about it.

  2. Yeah, that's very creepy.

    Why, though, did OP accept a friend request from someone she obviously didn't recognize, simply because he claimed to have gone to the same school as her? She seems pretty concerned about privacy, so it doesn't really make sense... but, maybe I'm just selective about who I "friend."

  3. Bottom line the guy was a creeper. I don't know everyone on FB that I friend, a friend of a friend maybe. This guy is a stalker.

  4. I don't understand why OP is getting grief about adding somebody she thought she went to college with. I doubt she really cares if somebody sees her in the black bikini, but it is awkward when a date says he saw you in it by adding you as a fake friend on facebook.

    I liked this story because halfway through wasn't "well, he seemed really creepy and I was uncomfortable. So I sat there and did nothing while just trying to hurry the date along" Thanks for being the 1% that actually leaves.

    1. All of this comment is what I was going to write :)

  5. I reckon that if he can track you down on Facebook he'll be bright enough to track down the name of an acquaintance through the photos of people you know that Facebook puts on your public profile.
    Taking their name & photo for a fake Facebook account sounds like 10 minutes work.

    So yeah, good call on walking out on this mentalist.

  6. Yeah, you really can't be all that worried about your privacy if you are adding "classmates" you don't remember. But I'm still Team OP, because dude was a creeper.

  7. The real mark of an evil genius is telling people your master plan

  8. A few years back I started dating a woman I met online. Her profile name was very unique, so I just randomly googled it one day and quite a few things popped up. One of them was a blog where she listed things she liked.
    So before our fourth date I called her to ask if she wanted anything from the liquour store. She said to grab her a six pack of beer. Knowing she liked Heineken, that is what I brought her. When she said it was her favourite, I told her that I knew because I read it online. She momentarily freaked, so I tried to explain that I stumbled across her blog of likes. She did not actually remember writing that blog so I had to show her that a one second google search gave anyone that information. Luckily, she believed me that I wasn't a crazy stalker. Her mistake. Just kidding.


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