Doggy Don't

Story Sent in by Sara:

Charlie and I met on a popular dating site and talked online for a solid week before he asked me out on a date. He offered to pick me up at my house (I didn't have a car at the time).

I was dressed and ready for the date. When I opened my door to let him in, I noted two things: one, he wore a fire-engine-red ball cap, and two, he had, cupped in his two bare hands, a small pile of petrified dog doo.

"Found this on your lawn," he said with a misshapen grin, "This yours?"

"Eww, no!" I backed away.

He dropped the contents of his hands right at my front door, then ran away.

He wrote me an email late that night, an apology. However, he also mentioned how hurt he was that I reacted the way that I did. Maybe he was right. Next time that happens, I'll act overjoyed.


  1. I have no idea what the intended response was supposed to have been.

    "Yeah, squeezed that little guy out just this morning after breakfast! You think that's something, check out what I did in the back yard!"

    1. "There it is! Awesome! Are you into bestial coprophilia too?"

  2. I suppose that's what you get for telling a stranger from the internet where you live.

  3. yeah i would have met him in a public place very close to public transport .... i honestly think his desired reaction would be.... "oh you Haha your so funny and handsome and charming... i cant wait to hold that dog shit covered hand"....

  4. Yes, for future reference, always meet in a public place, near public transportation. Always. Also, I'm not sure what the big deal is about a baseball cap that's red. Some baseball teams sport red caps. Anyway, hopefully the lesson was learned.


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