The Dark Knight

Profile Sent in by Laura:

What I'm doing with my life:

I like to think of myself as a real life knight, one who goes on quests and real adventures! Just yesterday I staged a quest to steal my neighbor's lawn gnome! I will replace it this night! If you want to join me tonight then write me soon!!!

My quest-related prides and joys have been reuniting one of my friends with his missing cat and also stealing the virginity of three maidens! You should have seen them chase me for it back, but I will never give their sweet virginal chains back, you hear me? Never!

I have since mounted them on my bed's headboard, like a real knight.


  1. I am impressed with the spelling. Got even virginal, gnome, and knight correct. The content? Not so much.

    For the longest second, I thought he had mounted the three no-longer maidens on the headboard.

  2. ^ An innuendo if I ever heard one.
    This guy needs to find better quests.

  3. ^I'd say he stole the panties they were wearing at the time.

  4. This guy must be from the same place as that girl from a while back - the one that had her own "virgin" necklace and wasn't giving it up for anybody, and claimed her mom was still a virgin too.

  5. That's what real knights did? No wonder they Came-a-lot...

  6. Right, what was that story called? The one with the girl claiming to be the product of a virgin birth?


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