Why "Very Single" Should Be a Relationship Status

Story Sent in by Brenda:

Trevor and I spoke online for a few weeks before meeting up in person. He offered to take me out to a bar that had just opened in the middle of downtown. We made it there early enough on a Friday evening so that the crowd wasn't too big. We found seats at the bar. However, after a couple of hours, the place was thronged with people.

Trevor said, "Good thing we got here early enough to get seats."

I nodded. He gave me an expectant look and I asked him, "What's up?"

He said, "You don't think it's a good thing that we got here early enough to get seats?"

I replied, "No, I think it was a great idea."

He said, "Then that's your cue to say, 'Great idea, Trevor. You were smart to bring us here early.'"

I rolled my eyes and said, "Great idea, Trevor. Thanks for bringing us here early."

He pulled out his smartphone and tapped away on it, which I thought was poor form. When he finished typing, he put it down and said, "I just made my Facebook status: 'A girl at a bar just called me smart. It's shaping up to be a great evening.'"

I said, "That's great."

He asked, "What else do you think of me? I can update my status right from here."

I said, "I think it's a little weird that you're updating your status while we're out on a date."

"Ooh!" he said, "That's good." He tapped away on his device and after a minute, looked up at me with a big smile and said, "Now I wrote, 'She called me weird. Uh-oh. Maybe she means in a good way?'"

I didn't answer. He asked, "Do you mean it in a good way?"

I replied, "You work at in a college lab, right?"

He replied, "Yes. I'll assume you mean that I'm weird in a good way. Are you wearing a bra?"

"What? Yes."

Out came the phone again. He tapped something in and gave me a wink when he was done. "Now I wrote that we're talking about your bra. This is gold!"

"Okay, you know what?" I asked him, and then I stood up.

He guessed, "Are you leaving?"

I said, "Yes. I don't think this is going to work."

He slapped his hand on the bar and said, "I don't believe this. You're just like the rest of them!"

Before I could reply, another young woman, who was among the many people jockeying for a seat at the bar, slid between Trevor and myself and took my previously occupied seat.

He asked her, "Are you wearing a bra?"

That's all I had to hear before leaving poor Trevor alone to update his status with however many numerous adventures he was sure to encounter that evening.


  1. OMG I'm reading this fun site and don't know what to write as a comment! lol :)

  2. What a complete jackass! Doesn't he realize that Twitter offers superior voice-to-text recognition and can update facebook automatically? It's obvious that his lack of technological competence will keep him single forever.

  3. Gotta love those guys who twist words around.

  4. He was probably posting to prove he could get a girl our make an ex jealous.

  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

  6. Jared, inre: the title of this story:

    Agreed. But no one would be self-aware to use it.


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