Were You in the "Plants That Emit Knockout Gas" Section?

Story Submitted by Nathan:

Erica and I were visiting a botanic garden on our first date.  We were there for less than a half-hour when she said, "I'm kind of tired.  Mind if we sit down for a little bit?"

We found a bench and sat.  I asked her if she was okay, and she said, "Yeah.  I'm just tired.  We should probably just end the date."

I raised an eyebrow.  "Uh... because you're tired?"

She nodded.  "I don't think I'm going to get un-tired anytime soon."

I wondered if she had low blood sugar and said, "I don't mind waiting with you.  Can I get you something?  Some coffee or a sandwich?"

She sprang up as if nothing was wrong.  "No, I'm suddenly okay," she said, "Let's keep going."

"You sure?"

"Sure am!"  A little strange, but maybe it was just part of her innate quirkiness.  We went on for another stroll, and less than another half-hour later, she flopped down on another bench.

"I'm tired again," she said.

I asked her, "Are you not feeling well?"

She replied, "I feel great.  Just tired.  You should probably end the date."

"Do you want to end the date?"

"I'm just going to keep being tired, so yeah."

I was disappointed, but figured that if she wasn't into it, there wasn't much of a point in forcing the issue.  I asked her again if she wanted anything.  She closed her eyes, said no, and so I left her there, on the bench. 

I had made it to the park entrance when she caught up with me.  "Hey!" she said, "I feel all un-tired, now.  We can keep going if you want."

I said, "Is this a game or something?  I don't get it."

She took my hand and said, "No!  Honestly.  I just got tired and thought that you wouldn't want to continue on with the date with me being so tired and all."

"Is it a medical issue?"

She said, "No!  I just get tired sometimes.  Don't you?"

"I guess."

I gave her the benefit of the doubt and we went on, back into the gardens.

Not 20 minutes later – you called it – she was dragging her feet and barely able to keep her eyes open.  Or so she appeared.  She sat down on another bench and said, "Seriously, you should just leave me here.  I'm going to be out like a light in like, 10 seconds."

I was tired of these antics, and so I said, "Okay.  Feel better," and left.

I double-timed it to the exit and drove off (we had taken separate cars).  Sure enough, she called me up when I had been on the road for 10 minutes.

"Where are you?" she asked, "I'm wide awake, now."

I said, "I'm on my way home."

"Come back!  I'll be awake forever!"

"No thanks.  Go get some rest."

"I don't need rest!  Come back!"

I said, "I'm sorry, no.  Good night," and we hung up.

She texted me the next day: "Want to go to the botanic garden again next weekend?"  I didn't reply.


  1. This totally seemed like she was trying to ditch you in a really unsubtle way, but calling you back every few minutes made me wonder if it wasn't really just some mind game to see how long she could sucker you like that.

  2. To me it sound more like she never grew out of being three years old. I picture her yawning really dramatically while simultaneously sticking a finger in her ear, then laying down on the floor saying "I just... can't... make it any further... sooooo tired..."

  3. Both my kids like to play a similar game when we go out, but in their case it's cute.

  4. "Poppies. Poppies will put [her] to sleep!"

    --said in my best Wicked Witch of the West voice--


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