Remote Commotion

Story Submitted by Corey:

Angela and I had been seeing each other for a couple of weeks when I was over at her apartment, which she shared with three other women. We were in the common living room, watching a film.

One of her roommates, Liz, came in to ask us what we were watching. She joined us on another couch in front of the TV and it was fine with me.

Not long after, another roommate, Michelle, came in with some food she had prepared in the kitchen. She joined us, too. Again, we were in a common area, and it was their house too, so I had no issue with it.

Angela did, though. After a minute or two, she groaned and looked around herself, as if searching for something. I asked her, "What are you looking for?"

"The remote," she said, "We're going to bring it to my bedroom."

I asked "Why? We're already watching it here."

She replied, "I wanted it to be just us," easily loud enough for her roommates to hear.

Michelle said, "Uh... you are watching it in the common area."

Not wanting to be impolite to her roommates, I told Angela, "I don't mind finishing it up down here. We can go up to your room after."

She ignored that, stood up, looked under the couch, looked on the coffee table, then searched under the pillows of the couch itself. "Where's the fucking remote?" she asked herself, "I'm going to stop this."

"I really don't mind watching it down here," I repeated.

She ignored that and faced Michelle and Liz. She asked, "Where's the remote?"

They shrugged, and Liz said, "You had it last."

Angela said, "Help me find it."

They didn't. She looked under the couches, on a nearby bookshelf, and even around the TV.  I said, "If you're looking for the remote to turn the TV off, you're already standing there, so why not turn it off from there?"

She spun and said, "Are you a moron? That's not the point! I want the remote! It's around here somewhere," she turned to her roommates and said, "Unless one of you is hiding it!"

Liz and Michelle traded a glance and Michelle said, "Uh, we're not. Why don't you just eject the movie, go upstairs with it, and we'll stay down here and not bother you anymore?"

Angela looked at me, as if to ask, "What do you think?"

I said, "Sounds good to me."

Angela flared her nostrils, ejected the disc from the DVD player, and stomped upstairs. "Fine!" she called, "I'll just watch it myself! And I want that remote!" She slammed a door closed upstairs, and left me alone with two of her roommates in a very awkward silence.

We didn't say anything to each other, but I looked around the room myself, and in less than a minute, discovered the missing remote between two plants on a windowsill.

I tossed it to Michelle and said, "Sorry about this."

Michelle smiled and said, "We're not the one dating her."

"I don't think I will be, after today, and I'm not the ones living with her."

They gave me weak smiles, and then I left. Angela sent me a text a few hours later: "I found the remote. Come back if you want to finish watching the movie."

As far as I know, she's still waiting for me.


  1. Or maybe she's berating her roommates for hiding the OP.

  2. Well, as neurotic as the date seems, living with roommates, I don't think I'd go in the living room when I know my roommate brought a date home... She overreacted but it sounds like she might be miserable living with those roommates and just blew up... The rebuttal story would probably be something about her being on a date and her roommates barging in on their date, with him date taking her evil roommates' side in the argument.

  3. Sound slike he missed out on some sex there.

  4. I don't know many people who can voluntarily "flare their nostrils". It always amuses me when writers use the phrase to try and colorfully indicate anger, because it just makes me think of Katie Kaboom from Animaniacs.

  5. ^I can flare my nostrils pretty well... am I some kind of freak?! I KNEW IT!

  6. @Ari - maybe the nostril flaring isn't voluntary, but something that just happens. My cheeks flush when I'm angry, but its not something I do on purpose, it just happens...

  7. AAAUUUUUGH! Connie! I'm a freak too!


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