Gluttonous Maximus

Story Submitted by Tanya:

Ricky took me out to a bar and grill that I had never been to before.  "It's great," he told me, "You've never had burgers like they make at this place."

I looked forward to it, and when we arrived, we were seated and things went fine for a little bit.  Ricky had a good sense of humor, and I liked his personality.  We ordered burgers, and they came out to us pretty quickly.

"Mmm, burgers!" Ricky said when the waiter placed his meal in front of him, and then Ricky grabbed the thing with both hands, then stuffed it into his mouth.  He chewed like crazy and pushed it in until there was nothing left in less than a minute.  His lips and lower face looked like some bloody catastrophe.

I hadn't even picked up my own burger, so fascinated and disgusted I was by his eating style.  I didn't have a chance to, though, as he wiped his mouth with his napkin, then pointed at my burger, asked, "Not hungry?" then grabbed it and shoved it into his mouth, repeating the process.

"These are so freakin' good!  Mmmm!" he said, his mouth full of my dinner.  He must have caught my look of disbelief and he said, "Don't worry.  We'll order you another one.  Mmmm!"

I was sufficiently grossed out enough to almost not take him up on it, but on principle, I did.  As soon as my burger was delivered, I grabbed it and started on it, as I didn't want to risk another meal's disappearance into his mouth.

He never gave an apology or explanation for eating both burgers, and I was sure to turn him down when he offered to take me out again - to the same place!


  1. I hope he paid for the meal!

  2. How was the burger?

  3. Mmm. Now THAT is a tasty burger!

  4. I don't see what the problem is. It may have been a little bit rude of him, sure, but if he was a genuinely nice guy in all other respects, I think I could have overlooked this.

  5. Nah, I'm with the OP. I wouldn't date a 3-year-old either. If he's this rude, selfish, and overbearing when he's trying to IMPRESS you, how much worse would it get when he relaxes a little?

  6. Hey OP, it's ok if the date acts like a complete slovenly pig. As long as he buys you food.

  7. Plus, the "Imma just going to take your food without asking" sets the "controlling!" flag a-wavin' just a bit.


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