Dead Ant Society

Story Submitted by April:

Derek and I were on our first date, on a walk through a park around sundown, when I noticed him slowing down and studying the pavement at our feet.

"Is everything okay?" I asked him, following his gaze downward.  A small group of ants were milling about.

He gave me a crazy look, said, "Raaargh!" and stepped on them.  I gasped, and then he scanned the sidewalk again.  He found more a few feet away, said, "Raaarrgh!" again, and stomped on them.

I asked him, "Why are you doing that?  Leave them alone."

He said, "They're smaller than me.  That's why."

I thought for a moment, then said, "I'm smaller than you.  You're not stepping on me."

He turned to me, raised his foot, and smashed it down hard on my right foot.

"Raaaargh!" he shouted.

I shoved him away and screamed, "You asshole!  What the fuck was that for?"

He said, "You asked me to do it."

"No, I didn't!"

He gave me the same sort of look you'd give a little kid you caught stealing from a cookie jar.  He said, "Let's cut the bullshit.  You asked me to do it.  Maybe it's some weird fetish thing.  I don't know."

I flipped him off, said, "Fuck off," and stormed away.

He called after me, "Don't get pissed.  Come on!"

I didn't stop, and he jogged after me.  As soon as I felt his hand on my shoulder, I wheeled around, screamed, "Get away from me!" over and over until he backed away.

"You're fucking crazy!" he said, and took off.  What a psycho.


  1. "I'm smaller than you. You're not stepping on me".. probably shouldn't have pointed that out.

    You tried to disprove his reasoning or something & all he did was stick to it so what the hell's your problem?


  2. While you didn't ask for it directly, you did say, "I'm smaller than you. You're not stepping on me." And instead of adhering to your logic, he held to his own.

    But the fact that he likes to pick on smaller creatures (the ants) than himself, is a clear indicator to me that he wouldn't be worth my time.

  3. Or, on a purely secondary basis, the fact that he's violent against women.

  4. Carpe diem! O Captain, my captain!

  5. Baku-chan, you beat me to it!
    OP has a right to be upset here. It's not about the ants. Derek's behavior shows OP what kind of a person he is. What she should have done is had that revelation internally and filed it away in her brain as RED FLAG!
    Stepping on things just because they're smaller says, "I can, therefore I should" or "I can, therefore I am entitled."
    While OP's reaction of flipping Derek off and shouting at him may have been justified (?), she certainly didn't show much more control over her urges than Derek did. Just because we can yell at people, or even if we feel entitled...should we? Or couldn't OP just have ended the date and gone home...?

  6. Fill in the blank:

    This often refers to a woman:

    _ U N T

    I hope you thought of the letter A, sickos!
    Sorry...stepping on ants made me think of this because I was shtupping my aunt.

  7. @Howie, glazing over your admittance of doing the deed with your mother or father's sister, I pronounce the word Ahhhnut, not like the insect ant, emphasis on the "u" I suppose. One day when I was young, I called my auntie "ANTIE" and she said "I ain't no bug." So since then I've used the other pronunciation and do encourage my nieces and nephews to do so as well.

    1. If my aunt couldn't tell from context whether I was talking about her or an insect, we'd have bigger problems than my pronunciation could fix.


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