Coming in at Number One, It's...

E-mail Submitted by Gina:

Poor you poor you all alone on this site
Poor you poor you all alone to-night
Poor you poor you hey you just might
Come over and sleep with me.

Something in my pants is thick
Something there will do the trick
Hey there I think it's my dick
Come over and sleep with me

Your hands on my thighs and pecs
Enjoy the pleasing effects
Of a night that's filled with sex
Come over and sleep with me



  1. I'd have to hear it to music to make a final decision...

  2. It's amazing how super sleazy things suddenly become less sleazy when in poetic form!

  3. Well at least he's direct.

  4. That's pwetty twite, Dwight.
    Think I'll call it a night.
    Alone - to my delight.

  5. Of all the ways I've seen a guy try to get into a girl's pants, this is probably the saddest.

  6. I guess things are a little too quiet at the Schrute beet farm...

  7. The Love Song Of Dwight Alfred Prufrock

  8. Poor me poor me, alone so long,
    I cry out for a man so strong,
    That all I get are men so wrong...
    Alas, not the one I need.

    I too have been consumed with lust,
    Too quickly with a man to trust,
    He won't suffice with just one thrust...
    And see to sate my need.

    Oh! Dwight, while your prose is grand,
    You certainly don't understand,
    The turbo power of my hand...
    Is all that I shall need

  9. Natalie, let's not make a baby. (I don't want kids, but I DO like boning. You. Me. Let's do it.)

    I like to find girls on the net
    and write poetry til they are wet.
    I just don't know why
    but each time that I try
    they see me as some kind of threat.


    Girls like poetry
    So I write them sexy songs
    Maybe we can fuck?

  10. Nikki I have been,
    Stalking you on here too long,
    I like boning too.


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