Unfortunately, His Name Is His Most Exciting Feature

E-mail Submitted by Alexa:

Subject line:
with eyes fixated on you like a McRib

The McRib opener is a bit creepy and cheesy but hopefully it caught your attention long enough for me to say: Hi!

Now that the hard part is over with I could always start rambling about how I was reading through your profile and noticed this or that while citing possible commonalties. *yawn*

I find it more fun to start any conversation with a stranger by asking one of the more difficult and possible most mind blowing questions I can think of.

Okay so are you ready (sorry that wasn’t the question)? How about now (nope not the question either)? Awesome now that you’re ready I can get to asking. So here we go! Just wait for it…………….., wait for it…………., keep waiting…. (tension is mounting)…, wait….. for …….. it. RUN FOR YOUR LIFE IT’S HERE!!!

My name is Bob, what’s your name?

OMG the humanity of it all!

Okay so that was scary! But at least now we can move on to easier and more serious topics and inquires such as: what is the meaning of life, what came first the chicken or the egg and does the light really turn off when you close the door to the refrigerator?

Hope to hear from you soon!



  1. "I could always start rambling"

    A guy who keeps his promises.

  2. ^ Very rare nowadays . . .

  3. I'm thinking Bob thought he was being funny.

    As a former stand-up comedian, I know funny and that was not funny.

    Keep hoping, Bob.

  4. If it doesn't sound funny out loud, it sure as hell won't sound funny on paper.

  5. @TommyD - If you are a FORMER stand-up comedian, how do we know that you really know funny and don't just think you do? Maybe you don't do it anymore because you don't actually know. Unless you don't do it because you do know and you weren't. I'm just saying. I thought it might be funny if he were a 12 year old.


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