E-mail Submitted by Steve:
Hello:
You may not know me but you look a lot like a guy I went to high school with. One time, he told everyone in my class who my secret crush was. Another time he took my lunch and threw it against the wall for no reason. Another time he drew a horrible picture f me on the board and the teacher left it on the board for the whole class.
He tried to break into my locker he said I should get eaten by bear (our high school mascot) and he said I was fat.
I hate him and because you look like him I'm sorry but FUCK YOU.
FUCK YOU,
MaryAnn
OMG WATCH OUT FOR BEAR
ReplyDeleteInstead of writing Steve, she should have just scheduled another session with her therapist.
ReplyDeleteOh Maryann...this guy had a crush on you! The signs are crystal clear!
ReplyDeleteHe took your lunch; drew a picture of you; called you fat and tried to break into your locker...Boys do these things to girls they like when they are young an immature. It's a way to get your attention, albeit, it seems ass backwards...but, he liked you.
What you probably didn't know was that he was inside the bear mascot and he clearly wanted to go grizzly on your vaginal picnic basket.
Mary Ann better be fat and only a couple years outta high school. Otherwise, she deserves all the suffering in life she's gotten.
ReplyDeleteWas it Manbearpig?
ReplyDeleteMore likely it was Pigbearman.
ReplyDeleteAgnes, you're my favorite Quaker for a reason. <3
ReplyDeleteAw, Nikki, I'm happy to be your Token Quaker Friend.
ReplyDelete... a vagina picnic basket. I love the internet.
ReplyDelete