Your Clothes Are Dry, But You Smell Funny

Submitted by Andrew:

I was a little early in arriving at Christina's house to pick her up for our second date.  Our first one had gone very well, and I was looking forward to seeing her a second time.

I called to let her know that I was outside, but to take her time if she was still preparing.

She said that she was glad that I had called, and asked if I'd mind coming in.  There was some sort of problem.

I went inside and she led me to her toilet, which was full of... well, clothes.

"They're stuck," she said.

"Why are there clothes in your toilet?" I asked.

She explained that for some reason, the water in her house was shut off, and that the only place wherein she could wash her clothes was the toilet.

"It's okay," she explained away, "It's the same kind of water that everything else uses."

"Why not bring the clothes to a laundromat?" I asked.  This, according to her, was impossible, as there were no laundry places close by, and she needed these clothes soon.

"But they're stuck," she said again.

I asked her if she had any rubber gloves.  She shrugged.  I looked in the cabinet under her bathroom sink.  There was one rubber glove.  I put it on and asked her for a garbage bag.

"You're throwing my clothes out?" she asked.

"No.  I just need a place to put them once I pull them out of here."

She grabbed me a bag and I went to work.  Most of them came out easily, but some were pretty deeply lodged in there.  After a few minutes, I was pretty sure that I had everything out, at least as much as I could see.

She tried to pick up the garbage bag, but it was full of wet clothes.  She asked if I'd help her carry it down to her dryer, which I did.  We stuffed her sopping wet clothes inside and started it up.

"Ready to go?" I asked her.

She looked down at herself and told me that some of the clothes she had wanted to wear were the toilet-water ones inside of the dryer.  "Would you mind waiting until they're dry?" she asked.

I was planning on spending the time with her anyway, so we played a few games and watched a movie.  Her clothes, because they were sopping wet, never dried fully that afternoon.

Around dinnertime, I suggested that we go out to dinner.

She said, "The clothes I wanted to wear are still in the dryer, remember?"

I suggested that she wear another outfit that was already dry.  She said that she only wanted to wear a set that was still damp inside of the dryer, and that she'd wear them if I insisted.

I didn't insist, but I again suggested that she put on a different outfit.

She suggested that I leave.  I left.


  1. Just. Plain. Gross.

    I couldn't do it either.

    Remember the Seinfeld tooth brush episode?

  2. Ridiculous. Just ridiculous. She's definitely a keeper and the OP is has common sense.

  3. Her toilet uses the same water as everything else in her house? So, what, no chemicals in it? That would be one dirty toilet. Gross.

  4. FAKE. We've seen our share of real pushovers on this site but I refuse to believe that any man would be desperate enough to waste time with a woman who washes her clothes in a toilet. That is an involuntary-commitment level of insanity.

  5. If the water in her house was shut off, how would the toilet still work?

  6. Was the date really old? because old people smell like pee anyway. The OP ducked a turd.

  7. Seven-Thirty9/12/2010 6:09 PM

    I must be slow in getting the idea. Did she think the flush handle was like the rinse cycle?

    How many pieces of clothing could you have in toilet bowl. One pair jeans and T-shirt, not much more.

    This post makes little sense... must be true.

  8. If this really was the case, wouldn't it be a little less crazy and disgusting to wash them in the toilet cistern where the water goes before the bowl? I dread to think what this girl was doing for drinking water, personal hygiene and washing plates. I wouldn't ask her for a glass of water. True or not, it's a funny story.

  9. If her water was shut off, then the toilet wouldn't have water either. Was the OP so desperate that he would stick around for a date with a woman who washes her clothes in the toilet, claiming water issues? If this story is true, the date sounds like a nutcase who smells like a toilet - Ewww!

  10. Just because you shut the water off doesn't mean there wouldn't be water in the toilet. You'd have to shut the water off AND THEN FLUSH IT to get rid of the water. The toilet bowl doesn't just drain itself because you shut the water off.

    And this girl sounds like a world class idiot. Clothes in the toilet bowl? The top part would have been one thing but still!
    Thinking you're going to throw them out because you asked for a garbage bag? Would she have let you throw them out if you had said yes?
    Putting sopping wet clothes in the dryer? Were you guys 15 or something? I don't call fake story, I call IDIOT.

  11. Agreed, 9:19. I don't want to call "fake" because I hate when people do that (remember: truth IS stranger than fiction), but...yeah....there were some common sense issues with this date.


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