6/08/2010

Urine Trouble

Submitted by Julie:

I first met Louis at a bar near my house when I was out with a few friends. I thought that he was a cool guy and we ended up talking all night at my friend's house after we left the bar. He asked me out for the upcoming Monday and I was all for it.

He showed up at my house on time, and I volunteered to drive. We spent the first couple of hours going to three different houses belonging to his friends, and he got stoned at each one.

We ended up back at the bar at which we had met a few days earlier, and we both got pretty drunk. Since I lived right near the bar, we walked to my house. I knew pretty much by now that I had no interest in him as anything more than a friend and that if he asked me out again, I would most likely say no.

When we arrived at my house around 2:00am, he asked me if it was possible to crash at my house, as he was pretty drunk to drive home. Being the nice person I am, I said yes.

Don't ask me why, but when we got inside, I grabbed a bag of chips and some soda, and told him that he could lay on the bed with me.  We lay there (fully clothed) for a couple of hours and just talked until we both crashed.

I had to get up pretty early for work the next morning and when I did, I had to crawl over him to get out of the bed. I remember when I did, I stepped on something wet on the floor, but for some reason I didn't think much of it at the time. When I had finished my shower and was getting dressed in the bathroom, I heard him run out the front door and yell, "Bye!  Talk to you later!"

I thought this kind of weird and ran into my bedroom... where I immediately understood why he had taken off so fast.

The whole side of the bed where he had slept was soaking wet. He had wet the bed in the night! I realized that what I must have stepped on when I first got out of bed were his wet clothes! He must have woken up in the night to discover himself in that condition and taken off his pants and underwear! It really grossed me out to think that he had to put those wet clothes back on and drive home in them!

I washed my sheets and completely doused my mattress with ammonia! I pretty much assumed that he would never be calling me again! But I couldn't believe it when I got home and the phone rang for over an hour with him calling and calling me.

After talking to my mom, I kind of felt bad for him... thinking how embarrassed he must have been and what I would have done in that situation. So I answered the call, and told him that what really bothered me was the fact that he didn't even offer to help me clean up or apologize. He said that I was right, and then asked me if I was still interested in hooking up that night for dinner!

I said that I didn't think that things were going to work out between us and he said "Yeah, me neither," and hung up on me!

A few months later, I met the guy who would become my future husband.  Turns out, he not only actually knew Louis, but said that I'm not the first girl to whom this has occurred!  To make matters worse, at one point we bumped into Louis at a bar.  He pulled my then-boyfriend at the time aside while I went to the bathroom and told him that I was going to sink my claws into him and never let him go! I sure let that one get away!


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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NWFXf2qjXeg

21 comments:

  1. You didn't need to douse the mattress with ammonia; sound like he took care of that for you.

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  2. Hahaha! Now this is a Jared link that I can fully support as hilarious and relevant to the story at hand!

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  3. Not very well written and OP showed herself not to have very good judgement, asking a guy to lie in bed with you, stepping on wetness and not even giving it a second thought? Or do you not even have a first thought in that head of yours.

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  4. Why is nearly every sentence ended with an exclamation mark?! It's a little distracting! I got so caught up in the punctuation! Periods are acceptable, too!

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  5. Truly bad decisions, OP. I think having stoner-pee on your bed is a logical consequence.

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  6. Who puts ammonia on their mattress? I have never heard of that? The pee smell is bad enough but then you add ammonia what?

    Sorry the story just bothered me and then it just got stupid

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  7. Seven-thirty6/08/2010 5:40 PM

    Bowel movement, bed-wetting, vomiting must be next.

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  8. Definitely poor judgment, OP. You said you went with this guy from house to house while he got stoned. . . Were you inhaling too? Please don't breed.

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  9. I was cold, so I put on a sweater!!

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  10. @ Jared - Loved the date title!

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  11. Gang, gang, we got it wrong. OP was applying the homeopathic philosophy to cleaning by adding a tiny bit of the filth to the mess to render it clean. Ingenious.

    I do hope the outcry has caused you to do the requiste google search and eliminate ammonia from your cleaning products, OP. It doesn't clean, it breaks up gunk (which other things do as well) and it damages your lungs.

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  12. Ammonia? It didn't smell enough like a wet diaper?

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  13. Aside from the obvious pissing problem...

    I really do wonder why girls think guys won't get the wrong idea by laying in bed with them.

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  14. Isnt this a site where people can write and vent about their bad dates? I didnt realize when I shared my story...that I would be ripped apart. Thought this was supposed to be a FUN site? Guess not. When this happened to me...I felt bad enough about it to begin with....and all you people ripping me to shreds? I forgot that you have never done anything stupid that you regret....my punctuation? My grammar? This isnt an english class....and as I wrote on my story...I was pretty drunk myself....so that may have caused me to do some of the dumb things I did, and or to put up with that night. I never said he was a bad guy...or not nice. And I have no issue with people getting stoned. Just not my thing. Just didnt find it a fun first date. So people..... stop being so critical of the people sharing their stories. Its supposed to be FUN..... not "Letmesharemybaddatestorywithyousoyoucanmakemefeellikeanevenbiggerloser" site...right? We all live, date, learn, and move on....hopefully to the right person.

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  15. One more thing......he didnt try a thing on me both nights I was with him! He was a nice guy...with a bed wetting problem...like I was supposed to see THAT coming....one more time...stop ripping me apart....this happened to me 6 years ago...THIS IS A FUN SITE! KEEP IT THAT WAY!

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  16. ^I am going to assume you were also drunk for your commenting. Trust me, it's the kindest assumption about you I can be making.

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  17. OP/10:47/10:49 (whew!) - Settle down. You are correct that it is fun, you are incorrect as to why. Now you know.

    I personally thought it was funny and it brought back memories of some of the drunks I used to hang out with. Pee, poo, vomit, all sorts of bodily fluids and whoops I fucked your boyfriends. Ah, those were the days.

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  18. Trainspotting, anyone?

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  19. HAHAHAHA! Oh man, first comment thread I read after a week away, and I get some ignorant story poster whining about how all of you made her feel like shit for being a retard. She's obviously never been to this site/read the comments before.

    Perhaps Jared should consider adding a disclaimer under the "submit a date" portion of the site: "Please note: If you submit a date to this site, anonymous trolls will judge you on your grammar, spelling, punctuation, judgment, and personality. This is the Internet, where anyone can make themselves feel better at someone else's expense. If you can't handle it, either don't submit, or don't read what people have to say about you."

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  20. I found myself wondering if you were high while writing this! Everything seems so exciting to you! You use too many exclamation points! It's rather annoying!

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  21. Sounds like a night of drunken stupidity to me. We all have 'em (albeit not so hilariously as you, it seems). I hope you've bought a new mattress since this escapade.

    Oh, and tell that Louis guy to go see a doctor. If he's wetting other people's beds on a regular basis, he's either got a medical problem or a fetish. Either way, he's going to need some professional help.

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