Wine, Women, and Song

Submitted by Kevin:

Jenny asked me out over a dating site and I was really looking forward to it.  She was short, really cute, had long dark hair, and had done modeling for a couple of print ads in the past.  Nowadays, she's a manager at a music company.

However, things went south faster than you can say, "What happened?"

The first mistake I made was hold a door open for her. She asked me what I was doing and I said that I was trying to be polite.  She went on a tirade about how guys put all of their politeness up front and center, so that we (guys) would thus ensnare women and by the time they realized that we weren't nice, they'd already be in a committed relationship with us.

I told her that I hadn't planned to stop being polite, and she said, "We'll see."  Great start.

Dinner went okay, but afterward, she insisted on going to a music store to look at guitars.  I play a little bit of acoustic but I'm actually into harmonica.  Doesn't matter.  She got into a conversation with the guy behind the counter that was clearly more enriching to her than anything I had said.

It's okay, though. I was equal to it.  I was able to cut into the conversation with guitar information of my own, and I know that I caught her off guard.  She said something like, "Kevin, we're having a conversation here."

I said, "I'm sorry.  I thought that we were trying to have a date."

She wagged a finger at me and said, "You're already turning rude.  I knew it."  She smirked.

Clearly something was wrong with this girl, and when she was finally done looking at instruments, we said goodnight and that was it.

She called me twice in the following week, but I was all done with her.


  1. you should not stop being polite. there aren't enough polite people in the world. and i agree with anonymous above... run.

  2. Agreed, katieb. She is obviously not one of the nice girls. >:P

  3. Rude woulda been busting her lip open. You should have been rude by the way.

  4. You need to pick better first date venues. Next time, try breaking into a dark warehouse after hours where you can make repeated attempts at kissing her with the lights out. Works (almost) every time.

  5. 11:23, I love you. Since I don't know you, I'm not going to ask you to merry me, but will you rape me instead?

  6. Wow, 11:28, that is the sweetest thing any woman has ever said to me.

    Besides "mmmphGGhAKK"

  7. 11:36, I'm not a woman...


  8. Swordfight!

  9. story good.

    comments sublime.

  10. That's cool, 11:28... I'm not a man.

  11. ^ Nope.

    Bend over, bitch.

  12. 11:23, then it's only going to work if you do me... I'm a gay bottom. Can we tape some pubes to your chest? 10:31 can watch, or join.


  13. It was not a warehouse, it was a THEATER. The Rape Theater. Geez guys. And i'd love to watch too, or better yet, i'll tape the pubes and join in the love fest, 11:28.


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