Unhappy Birthday to Me

Submitted by Veronica:

Tim and I had been dating for over two years when this epic date occurred.  I naively told him that for my birthday, I wanted him to take me on a date.  The plan was simple: the standard dinner-and-a-movie evening.  He would pick the dinner, I would pick the movie, but the evening was supposed to be about me.

He took me to a sushi restaurant and we got a cocktail as we waited for our dinner.  He recognized someone through the window, going by on the street, and started talking shop with them for about a half hour, never once introducing me.

After his friend left us and we completed our dinner, the check came and he asked me for some money to cover the bill.  Suppressing the rage that threatened to spill over, I forked over the cash.  Determined to enjoy my "birthday date," I tried to shake it off and looked forward to the movie.

Once at the theater, I made him pay for both tickets.  We took our seats and waited for the movie to begin.  As we sat there, he complained about the size of the screen, the people in front of us, the sound quality, the smell of the theater, etc.

After about 10 minutes of this tirade, he turned to me and said that we should get his money back and leave.  Now I was pissed.  There was no way I was going to enjoy any movie and the night was turning out to be a disaster.

We walked out of the theater and he grabbed my hand.  "It's a lovely night, why don't we just walk a bit," he said.  I agreed and we did some window shopping.

We stepped into a shoe store and browsed.  Next thing I knew, he bought a pair of shoes.  Luckily, he had cash from my share of dinner and the movie we left!  At this point, I was finished with the saddest excuse for a date ever and asked him to take me home. 

We then embarked on a 30-minute hunt for the car because he couldn't remember where he parked.  By the time we spotted the car, my feet hurt, I was utterly disappointed, and I wanted to go home.  He quickened his pace and ran up ahead of me.  My heart leaped as I thought that he was going to try for one last-ditch date gesture.  He was going to open my door for me, like a gentleman.  Hooray!  I quickly forgave the entire evening based on this one little gesture.

As he reached the car, he opened the trunk, lovingly put down his newly-purchased shoes, then got in the car.  I got to the passenger side door and struggled with the handle.

He had forgotten to unlock it.


  1. It does sound like this birthday was a downer and the guy not a prize, but - after *two years* of dating, you're still expecting him to to pay for everything? Even when the date was your idea, not his? I don't know, I guess if you were thinking of it as being in lieu of a birthday present it makes sense, it just seems odd to me to be mad to be asked to help cover a check two years in.

  2. Good Lord. What kind of boyfriend had he been up until this point? And if this was pretty much what he was like, why did you put up with it for two years?

    If you two had just met each other or hadn't been going out for very long, this date would have only been awkward and uncomfortable, but the fact that you had invested time and energy into this relationship only to have him let you down so fully on your birthday...that just makes it worse. My sympathies.

  3. Anon #1- it was her birthday! Of course she shouldn't have paid. Who cares if dinner and a movie was her idea- she didn't even mention a present. He sounds like a wanker and she's way better off w/o him.

  4. You dated for two years and had a minor holiday wrecked by a bad evening. That sounds....well, perfectly normal in the course of a life, actually. Sorry about your birthday and all, but it's hardly a blip on the bad dates scale.

  5. Who dates for 2 years?
    It sounds like you're making this sound worse than it was.. you even mentioned that you had to struggle with the door handle.. boo hoo. And that HE forgot where the car was.. as if you weren't with him the whole time, you could have remembered it yourself?
    Fail on your and his part.

  6. this isn't really a bad date...more like a bad relationship. I agree with anon #5 fail on your part for seeing him for two years. Also, some of it sounds made up...I'm going to guess you're still together too...

  7. Two years! I hope that you two had a good relationship until then. I agree with Anon#4 that relationships have ups and downs. This is more evidence that no one is safe from the constant threat of the Bad Date.
    Anon#5-- It sounds like you are taking this a bit personally.

  8. A lot of this story seems exaggerated and made up. No relationship would last 2 years with a guy acting as he did in the story.

  9. I agree that it sounds like a contrived story..
    And if it's not, then after 2 years of dating this loser, she deserves him. Only a doormat would accept that behavior from a guy.

  10. Do movie theaters really just fork your money back over to you if you don't like the film? That's what previews and Ebert are for.

  11. I hope he's now an ex-boyfriend.

  12. I've also been with my boyfriend for 2 years and I've never had to pay for movie tickets and hardly ever food. So to deal with that on your birthday is unthinkable. Hope you're done with him...

  13. what kind of shoes?

  14. It's called life. Laugh it off. Your feet were sore? Hiking is good for you, strengthens the muscles. Your complaints are torture to read. Growing up a bit more is in store, methinks.

  15. the ONLY funny part of this crap... is:

    Anonymous said...
    what kind of shoes?

    :D hehehe

  16. i don't think this sounds made up at all. it sounds completely normal for a relationship that has gone on that long and was likely already dying before that date. chances are various aspects of the relationship preceeding this caused his apathy to the night and she was probably already feeling let down from him over the previous years... this night just kind of hit a crux. been there done that.


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