Boys and Their Robots

Submitted by Sara:

Jeff showed up to the bar on our first date with his polo shirt inside-out.  If that wasn't bad enough, he was sweating profusely.

Maybe he was just nervous.  Whatever it was, the smell was more than enough of a turn-off.  Still, I thought that it would be mean to not give him a chance.  Like I said, he may just have been nervous.  Very nervous.

The first question Jeff asked when we sat down for drinks was, "Have you ever been married?"

"No, Jeff.  I haven't."


"Why 'really'?"

"I don't know.  I figured that someone like you would have been."

I'm sure that he meant it as a compliment, and so I tried to take it as one.  At first.

Then, he added, "Because you're definitely old enough to have been married."

I raised my eyebrows and raised my glass.  "Cheers," I said, toasting him.  Well, how else could I handle it?  The guy was obviously socially awkward, and we continued with the chit chat.  He seemed harmless.

Up until:

"Do you like power tools?"

I said, "I can't say that I do, Jeff."

"Because I'm building something awesome in my garage, and I'm building it out of power tools."

"Wow.  What are you building?"

"It's a robot to kill spiders around the house."


"Yeah.  I've been working on it since grade school."


"Yeah.  It kills ants really good."

I asked him, "Why do you want to kill spiders and ants?"

He corrected me, "I don't want to kill ants, but I have to test it on something before I bring it inside to kill the spiders."


He was quiet for a moment, then finished with, "Want to see it?  It's seven feet tall."

Check please.


  1. Thats awesome, you should have been more open minded. Its obviously a hobby and he's really passionate about it, he wanted to share with you.
    I wonder if you'd pass up an engineer too if he'd been building something unconventional, assuming this Jeff wasn't an engineer.

  2. Sweaty + Power Tools + Fear of Spiders

    = Methamphetamine

    = bullet dodged!

  3. First ants, then spiders, then people! Mwahahahaha!

  4. I love when people try to defend some of the weirdos on here... clearly its people that are in the same boat.

  5. I agree with the poster who said he sounds like he's on meth! He has all the signs of that!

  6. Man, guys on meth seem to have a real easy time getting dates.

  7. He was messing with you. No one builds a seven foot tall robot to kill spiders. He probably thought that you were a bad date and wanted to have a good laugh after it was all over.

  8. I would have totally gone to check out the robot thing!

    I'd have dumped him AFTER that!

  9. See.. that's her fault. She still continued the date with that psycho after the smelly sweaty meetup.

  10. I'm I the on;y one that thinks she sounds like a bitch? "'I can't say that I do, Jeff'"... seriously, who talks like that.

  11. It was really a rape robot. Way to dodge that bullet!

  12. Those must be some big spiders.


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

Content Policy

A Bad Case of the Dates reserves the right to publish or not publish any submitted content at any time, and by submitting content to A Bad Case of the Dates, you retain original copyright, but are granting us the right to post, edit, and/or republish your content forever and in any media throughout the universe. If Zeta Reticulans come down from their home planet to harvest bad dating stories, you could become an intergalactic megastar. Go you!

A Bad Case of the Dates is not responsible for user comments. We also reserve the right to delete any comments at any time and for any reason. We're hoping to not have to, though.

Aching to reach us? abadcaseofthedates at gmail dot com.