Fantasy Section

Dana was a coworker of mine at a video rental store.  While our asshole manager would frequently leave the store in the evenings for hours on end and go god-knows-where, Dana and I would be left alone.  Two 20-somethings.  Alone.  In a video store.

The thing is, Dana was one of those girls who had perfected the razor's edge of flirtatiousness while all the while appearing to not be flirting at all.  Example?  Fine.

She'd say, "You know, you kind of look like Johnny Depp."

I'd reply, "Really?"

She'd say, "Yeah, but like Edward Scissorhands Johnny Depp.  Kind of sad."

Another example?  She once said, "Why can't I find a guy who'll treat me well?"

I said, "I'd treat you well."

She'd smile and say, "Aww.  You're sweet.  I bet you would.  You're a nice guy."  Then, she'd give me an endearing look, but only for a moment before her eyes would widen and she'd say, "Want to help me shelve these DVDs, Mr. Nice Guy?"

So one time, we were both behind the front desk and I clicked it up a notch.  We were alone in the store and I asked her, "Dana, want to go out sometime?"

"Like for beer?  Sure!  We can be work buddies!"

Not exactly what I had in mind.  I took it up another peg.  "How about dinner and a..." I was going to say "movie," but I realized that it would be like saying, "Let's spend leisure time paving roads once our road paving job is over for the day."  Instead, I said, "How about dinner and a walk by the river?"

"I don't know.  That sounds like a date."

"It would be."

"Uh, no, then."

"Why?  Because we're coworkers at a video store?  That's a lame excuse."

"No.  It would just be weird."

I stepped closer.  She stepped back.  I asked, "Weird?"

"Yeah.  I kind of like you, so it would be weird."

"You like me?"


"And that's why you don't want to go on a date with me?"

"I don't know.  I guess."

"That's stupid."

"Fuck you.  I'm going to go shelve sci-fi."  She stepped out from behind the counter.

I said, "I shelved that section twenty minutes ago."

"I'll shelve kids fantasy."  She disappeared behind the horror section as she continued away.

We had no kids fantasy section.


  1. Friend zone. You might as well have the sexuality of a pokemon. The best you get to look forward to is you being the first person she tells about every freaky relationship she gets involved in. Look someplace else.

  2. Aw.. that's cute..

  3. dude she obviously was trying to reject you nicely... she knew you were asking her out and was trying to show you that you were in the friend zone by saying you could be work buddies... why do guys not understand signals like that? it forces girls to be meaner about rejecting them

  4. We get those signals just fine, they're just dumb. Why can't girls be adults and just say no?

  5. "Rejecting nicely" is a confliction of terms and an idiotic concept. You don't have to be cruel, just be direct: "Look, Jim, I'm just not interested in you."

    Plus it seems like this girl is a flirt, and liked the attention that he was giving her up until the point he made it too "real" and called her on it.

  6. wow her signals were very obvious. she likes you, she is NOT into you lol that was very obvious.
    or in 3rd-grade-speak: she likes you, not "like" likes you :P
    she wasn't even flirting, just playing.
    she did step AWAY from you, you know!! shes not into you. she was trying to give you an out, by saying, "for a beer?" take the excuse next time ^o~

  7. Sam-a girl can't flirt without being willing to go on a date? That is patently ridiculous. She can reject him whatever way she wants. She flat out said "no" but he wouldn't take it for an answer.

  8. What flirting? Even in his examples she's obviously just making conversation.

  9. She's using you, bro. The more she can get you aroused, the more she can get you to do work for her, give her attention, etc... but she'll never actually give you any emotional fulfilment, let alone sex, forget about it.

    Dump that user, pronto.

  10. "Two 20-somethings. Alone. In a video store."
    LOL Why is it that loser girls aren't attracted to loser guys? Sorry someone had to say it.

  11. I agree with Hazel Stone. The given examples don't sound a thing like flirting to me. Unless she ever said that she thought Johnny Depp was hot, her comment about him looking like Johnny Depp had no deeper meaning. (And no, not every girl thinks he's hot. I don't feel that way at all.)

  12. She wasn't flirting, and she gave you every hint to stop flirting with her. She also let you off pretty easily, it's really icky when a co-worker won't take no for an answer.

  13. "Two 20-somethings. Alone. In a video store."

    Dear god, did the world end? Is being alone in a store with someone of similar age and opposite gender automatically code for "we're going to fuck on every surface in here there is."?


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