The Inflationary Universe

Story Sent in by Martie:

I was out to dinner at a BBQ place with Gene. We both had ordered chicken and were enjoying our meals when he asked me if I had ever blown up any chickens.

I asked, "Blown up... as in with dynamite?"

He said, "Sure. Or whatever else."

"No. I think that would be cruel."

"Oh," he said, then became really quiet.

After a too-long silence I asked him, "Why do you ask?"

He said, "I'm glad I asked. It's okay. I'll come up with something different for us to do, instead."

I put my dinner down, as my appetite was lost. I said, "You were actually going to take me to do that?"

He shrugged, "I have everything we need in my trunk. You think about it and let me know."

Yeah... no. First and last date.


  1. So, how many chickens does it take to fill a trunk?

    1. Depends, are you using a blender or putting them in whole?

  2. I can fit about 30 chickens in the Veloster and about 90 or so in the Zephyr.As for blowing up chickens Gene never said they had to be live ones.Someone should tell Gene to stop playing with his food.chickens are for frying in peanut oil and eating not shoving M-80's up their butts.

  3. Best. Date. EVAH! I picture Gene asking this question, smiling to himself at his forethought to fill his trunk with chickens and explosives. Then Martie gives her answer and his face slowly falls and he starts trying to decide what to do with 30 chickens (assuming he was driving a Veloster).

    1. Also, I'd bet dollars to donuts this date took place in North Carolina.


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

Content Policy

A Bad Case of the Dates reserves the right to publish or not publish any submitted content at any time, and by submitting content to A Bad Case of the Dates, you retain original copyright, but are granting us the right to post, edit, and/or republish your content forever and in any media throughout the universe. If Zeta Reticulans come down from their home planet to harvest bad dating stories, you could become an intergalactic megastar. Go you!

A Bad Case of the Dates is not responsible for user comments. We also reserve the right to delete any comments at any time and for any reason. We're hoping to not have to, though.

Aching to reach us? abadcaseofthedates at gmail dot com.