Cane and Unable

Story Sent in by Jimmy:

Christine was apparently in a bad accident a few weeks before our date, so she used a cane when she walked. She told me, not long after we met in person, that this was one of her first times out since the accident. I assured her that I'd to everything I could to be understanding and accommodating.

Her first request came before we even sat down to eat. We were outside walking when she said that she was jealous of the fact that I was walking around without a cane, and she asked me to either buy a cane at a local store or use a stick, so that we could walk around with canes, together. I must've asked her half a dozen times if she was serious, and she assured me that she was.

I found a thin stick nearby. It would in no way support my weight, but I asked her if it would do. She said it wouldn't. I told her that I'd go to a store to buy a cane. I wasn't really going to buy one, but I thought I'd find a way to talk her out of it on the way there.

She said, "I'm not going to follow you around all over the place. I'll wait here, you find one, then come back." She sat down on a bench in front of a laundromat.

I said okay, and headed off in the direction of a pharmacy.

I didn't realize until this very moment that I completely forgot to return to her.


  1. I brought a cane to my first date with Tannette, along with spats, a top hat, and a feathered boa, because I'm a []D [] []v[] []D.

  2. I can understand OP's frustration with Christine, but it was a bit low to just leave her like that. If she has mobility problems, how was she going to get home?

  3. ^Gonna have to disagree there - her request was absurd and crazy. Good thing she didn't lose her leg, she'd probably request that her date chop off his leg to make her feel better.

    Way to give the crazy lady a dose of reality, OP.

  4. You should have told her you didn't need a cane, you already came equipped with a third leg!

  5. There comes a point where one's safety trump etiquette and politeness. If Christine was that insistent, chances are if he slept with her, he'd wake up in a scene from Misery.

  6. OP doesn't say if he did really shell out for that cane...any chance he picked up a spine while he was there, too?

    Who agrees to spend money on an aid they don't need to placate a crazy demand from a first-time date?

  7. He said he headed off int he direction of a pharmacy. I took that to mean "Oh, yeah, there's a CVS three blocks away... I'm TOTALLY going there now. To get a cane. Yup!"

  8. I would have taken her to a grocery store and set her up on one of those electric carts, because I'm a gentleman like that...

  9. This story makes me think of the Cane episode from News Radio, which makes me laugh. You should have stolen her cane, OP!

  10. Steve, I'll be your GG any day all day. ;) Yes, Daddy. Y'all are making me crack up. Okay, I don't know why OP didn't just say that he wasn't going to buy a cane. But what ever.

  11. "There comes a point where one's safety trump etiquette and politeness. If Christine was that insistent, chances are if he slept with her, he'd wake up in a scene from Misery."

    Doesn't matter, had Sex.

  12. I don't think Kathy Bates' character in Misery ever had sex in the movie. Correct me if I'm wrong. I've only seen it once.


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