Dr. What

Story Sent in by Joan:

Kyle excused himself to go to the bathroom on our date at a coffee shop, and he never came back. I called him once, he didn't pick up, and I figured that he ran out on me for whatever reason.

The entire affair would've been completely forgettable if not for his writing of an email to me the following morning, explaining to me that he had become suddenly and violently ill, and that he was very sorry and felt awful for leaving me there and that he could produce a doctor's note and so on and so on. It was pretty sad, so I decided to give him another chance. He offered to take me out for lunch on a forthcoming weekend.

At that lunch, once again, he left the table for the bathroom and again, he didn't come back, leaving me with the tab. What was strange was that he barely touched his lunch, so the idea of him doing this as a ploy to obtain free lunches seemed to not hold any water.

He emailed me again to let me know that he was sorry for apparently ditching me a second time. However, his excuse this next time was different. He wrote that he accidentally stepped through a time portal and arrived back at our table exactly one year prior to when our date was, and he had spent the better part of the night trying to find his way back to the present time.

He went on to say that he finally found his way back thanks to a talking family of cats. He then told me that he could produce a doctor's note and one of the cats as proof.

I emailed him back, telling him that I wanted to see the doctor's note and hear the talking cat.

He wrote back to inform me that the talking cat had run away, but he did send me a blurry picture of a few scribbles on what looked like a napkin. His "doctor's note." He asked me for another chance for a date, but wouldn't you know it, I completely forgot to ever write him back.


  1. Replies
    1. Yeah, OP — I notice you conveniently left out where you met this awesome specimen.

  2. Jared, when you edit these stories, do you change the words to 'fortnight' or 'forthcoming'?
    I noticed a pattern and I really do not know that many people who talk like that. True!?

    1. A lot of people don't talk like that, but the more coherent stories, the ones that make it on here, are typically written by people who write like that.

    2. A-Ha! I come not, friends, to steal away your Today it makes sense.

  3. You went on a date with Dr. Who? In that case, I guess it would be pretty easy for him to get a doctor's note.

  4. Kyle dropped the ball here. It would have been easy put a talking cat on the phone. FaceTime/Skype, now that would be a bit harder.

  5. Must have been Schroedinger's cat.


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