I've Been Through the Dessert

Story Sent in by Ramona:

Robert and I were at dinner on our first date and split a slice of cheesecake for dessert. As we went at it, one of his forkfuls grazed my pinky finger.

"Whoops!" he said.

I went for my napkin. "It's okay," I said.

He dropped his fork, grabbed my hand, and licked the cheesecake off of my finger. Not okay for a first date. I ripped my hand away. He said, "Good thing I didn't drop any on your boobs. I'd have to lick that off, then!"

"All right," I replied, anxious to steer the conversation anywhere else.

We were almost finished with the dessert when he pointed over my shoulder and said, "What's that waiter doing?"

I turned to look, and he reached across the table with a bit of cheesecake on his fingers and smeared them onto my upper chest.

"Ugh!" I yelled and slapped him away. He then lurched across the table, mouth agape, tongue stretching at where he had just soiled my chest. I pushed him away, went for a napkin, and wiped my chest clean.

"What's your problem?" he asked, as if I was somehow at all at fault.

"Excuse me," I said, and left him there without even offering to help pay for dinner. I think I earned that escape.


  1. Ok, I'm just gonna say it, OP you suck.

    First, if your shirt was low enough that he was able to wipe cheesecake on your chest, even your upper chest, you were flaunting your assets. I'm big busted and for my shirts to cover my bra, not a whole lot of upper chest is normally visible, unless I purposely dress that way.

    Wave 'em out there and you get what you get.

    Second, a classier move would have been to toss down enough funds to cover your share before you walked out. You earned nothing, not even my sympathy.

    1. Agreed. And if he had stabbed her, then her own damn fault for having skin exposed for him to stab at in the first place.

    2. Well with that viewpoint no one is ever a victim.

      Women show cleavage for attention. Obviously she got his.

      I don't necessarily believe that his actions were deserved. But she never should have said "all right" in response to his suggestion. THAT was the time for indignation.

    3. Oh look! The self-righteous whackos have decided they need to make their moronic opinion known!

      I totally agree! It's so not fair that anyone gets shown anything they can't touch. That's why I always break the display cases in jewelry stores and rub my ass on paintings in a museum!

      Being sexy is bad and wrong, and whoever dares to turn on another human being, like sex is something fun and warm between two people, deserves to be treated badly.

    4. Its rather sickening how a woman can buy into the whole 'woman dressed to deserve it bit' popularized by guys who don't wish to control themselves (and perhaps, judgemental women).

      She could have been naked and anyone decent still wouldn't have acted like that.

      While tossing down some money wouldn't have been out of place, your comment definitely is.

    5. lilindrome that was a beautiful image, thank you :)

    6. wow, judgmental much?? where in the story does it say anything about it being on the bare skin of her upper chest? when i read it, i just assumed he smeared it on her shirt. and no, it doesn't matter WHAT she was wearing...no one has the right to put their hands on anyone else! god, you sound like a douchebag from the 1940s... "she was wearin a mini skirt, your honor, of course i raped her!" wtf.

  2. What? Is this like fight club and we aren't supposed to talk about it? Is this just a secret among women? Did I spill the beans on my own sex?

    Women dress and act provocatively to get attention. And then act surprised when men behave like pigs or other women talk about them? Hah.

    OP said "All Right", did you miss that? Whether she meant it or not, apparently he took it as consent.

    I will concede that perhaps OP is young and/or naive. We learn by experience.

    I, however, have yet to learn not to feed the trolls.

    1. Not even your own young?

    2. Queen, you're unbelievable. Spilling the beans on your own sex? Get over yourself!

      As someone else said, the OP never says that her shirt is super low-cut. You're making that assumption. Or what, do you expect her to say something like, "He smeared it on the part of my shirt that was located over the skin of my upper chest"?

      Also, she says clearly that she said "all right" when she was trying to change the subject. We can't hear the way she said it, but you can't judge her without knowing her inflections. The way she says it is everything. "All right", can be dismissive, awkward, or any of a multitude of things. You're choosing one that allows you to judge her.

      Why don't you try to think about how you would deal in this situation, and give the poor girl a break, huh? NOBODY is asking for it, and NO ONE deserves to be treated like this. It's disgusting!

  3. QOTU, watch The Tao of Steve some time:

    He - You are such a self-aggrandizing, solipsistic ego queen.
    She - You don't even know you're... Did you say solipsistic?
    He - I most certainly did.
    She - I love that word.
    He - I do too.

    He - Am I supposed to remain celibate while I bask... in the warm glow of your annihilating contempt?

  4. She didn't say she had a plunging neckline. "Upper chest" can be visible without cleavage. As someone who is rather well endowed in that region, they can be tough to hide if they're even remotely well-supported, even if not overtly on display.

  5. @QOTU. You are wrong. YOU dress and act provocatively to get attention. Dont put all women on the same place just because we dont act like you. Some women can actually get guys attention because they are smart and fun. If YOU need to dress up and act like a slut to get peoples attention then you have a problem

  6. Two thoughts:

    1) Upper chest could refer to any area below the clavicle which, on most folks, is only slightly below the shoulder line. I think of "upper chest" as the area below the clavicle but above the start of the armpit. It's hard to find non-turtleneck shirts that don't show at least an inch of that area.

    2) What does that say about bathing suits? I guess I transition into an unsuccessful prostitute every summer.

  7. QOTU:

    I have big boobs. I have trouble finding shirts that cover me. If I find a shirt that covers me and still looks flattering, it's a good day. Regardless of how much skin/cleavage I have showing, NOBODY has a right to put their hands on you without your consent.

    Except your Mum. She was good.

  8. I wear clothing that reveals clevage when im hot and sweaty in 90 degree weather, not just to flaunt myself.

  9. I never thought I'd see someone with a fleur de lis avatar and an username of "Queen of the Universe" argue FOR the burka concept. [sarcasm]How worldly of you.[/sarcasm] speaking as one of the men who don't support that viewpoint self control is our responsibility. If it's really that hard not to molest people you're the one who needs help not everyone else.

  10. Wow Queen of the Universe. Just wow. You complained on another post (yes, I'm sitting here reading them all) that some women are pathetic for staying on a date despite it not going well for a free dinner. Then you turn around and admonish the OP for walking out on a date that was clearly a jerk without paying? Which is the lesser of two evils to you? I mean, pick a damn side and stick with it!

    Also, did you ever stop to think the OP might have been wearing a modest scoop neck tee-shirt that didn't show her boobs, just her upper chest area? You just defaulted that she had her tits on display and was just begging her douche date to smear her with cheesecake to lick her. Maybe that's the way YOU roll, but not all women roll like you obviously do.

  11. Doesn't matter if she was showing a little cleve or not, he had absolutely no right to touch her person in any way, shape or form. I'm pretty annoyed that he licked the cheesecake off her finger.

  12. What is wrong with people in these stories? Ugh.

    I'm picturing her saying, "All right" in an annoyed, almost angry tone, like my mother would have said to me as a child when I was acting up: " All right, knock it off!" I didn't take it as, "Okay, sure!" ::giggle:: Like another poster mentioned, it's hard to determine what the inflection was. "All right" was probably not a good choice of words, seeing as the guy could assume she was giving permission. But seriously, what kind of jackass thinks this behavior is okay?

    To me, it doesn't matter what she was wearing. Wearing a cleavage-revealing shirt does not mean a woman wants attention. Some women, yes, absolutely. But not all. I have worn revealing shirts myself, just because I liked them. I know that I may attract the wrong type of attention, but that still does not give a man (or woman, for that matter) the right to touch me.

    And if you have a body that someone finds appealing, it doesn't matter how you dress - a person who has no manners is still going to ogle, comment, or whatever.

    Just my opinion.


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