Give Him a Sand

Story Sent in by Nicole:

Phil insisted on taking me to the beach at night for our first date. I insisted that it be during the day, while at least some other people were around. He assented, and so we went on a clear Saturday morning. There were a few people around, and that was good enough for me. We had a nice walk, about a half-mile up and down.

After a solid hour, I asked him what he wanted to do for lunch. He said, "Glad you asked," then sank to his knees and dug in the sand with his hands.

"Um, what are you doing?" I asked him.

He replied, "It was right around here. I just know it. I just... know it."

I said, "What are you looking for?"

He said, "You'll see."

After another minute of his digging down, I asked, "Maybe we can do lunch and then you can come back here to look for whatever it is you've lost? I mean, if it's already been buried for a little while, then another–"

"Shut the hell up!" he screamed, then redoubled his efforts, digging into the wet sand.

I'm not even sure if he noticed, or if he ever noticed, that I left.


  1. Or it was somehow easier than saying "I am not interested in buying you lunch, get lost!"

  2. Or he could have been looking for a crab or something, so he could show off his hunting skills and provide her with fresh crabs for lunch (I was going to fix that but every time you keep a potential reference to public lice in your comment, a Howie gets its wings)

  3. Howie can make a much better joke with private lice, though.

  4. :D damn that was karma for my pedantic enforcing of your vs you're on Facebook.

  5. Maybe he was digging for the knife he was going to dismember her with.


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