Bagel Run

Story Sent in by Dan:

I found Nancy's profile online and wrote her. She wrote back a colossal, three-paragraph message in which she went over her life story, her spiritual beliefs, and her long-term goals. Her tone was friendly, and she asked me plenty of questions throughout. While it might have been a case of too much information, she made herself sound interesting. After messaging for a little bit, we exchanged numbers and set up a date.

The plan was to go on a walk, visit a gallery or outdoor art festival (that we knew to be taking place that day), do lunch, and then play things by ear. We lived in a big suburb with plenty to do.

I arrived at our meeting spot in the main town square and looked around to find her. It was a nice day and plenty of families were out.

"Dan!" someone screamed from what sounded like a distance.

I turned and looked. Across the street, Nancy wore a huge smile, pointed, waved her arms, screamed again, and ran for me. When she reached me, she nearly knocked me over with her hug, then held my shoulders tightly and said, "Oh my God," then looked around, turned back to me, and continued, "I love you. I love you! I love this day, this pavement," she stomped on the ground with a foot, "the sky, and just everything!"

She sure was happy. I said, "Great. I... it's good to see you, too."

She gave me another smile, then hugged me again. "You too!" she said, then stepped away from me and her eyes went so wide that I could almost see white all the way around her irises. "Oh my God!" she barked, "You've got to see this! Follow me!"

She ran down the street. I hurried to keep up, but she ran breakneck and I lost her. I called her up and left a message, asking her where she was, and telling her that I'd wait for her at a particular corner.

She called me back almost immediately. "Where are you?" she asked.

"I'm at Main and Shelton."

"That's not where I am!"

"Evidently. Where are you?"

"Hang on."

Within a minute, she had found me. I asked her, "Where are we going?"

She smiled, showing almost all of her teeth. "It's a surprise! Follow me!" She tore off again, so fast that she seemingly didn't want to be caught.

"Nancy!" I called after her, but she was oblivious, or else ignored me. I yelled, "We'll get there faster if we go together!" but she was gone.

I went to a bagel place, figuring that if she really wanted to hang out, she'd call me. She did, not long after I sat down to my bagel.

"Where are you?" she asked.

"At Porter Bagels. Come join me."

"What are you doing there?"

"Having a bagel."

"Wow. Not only are you an asshole... you're a complete asshole." She hung up. Complete asshole that I am, I didn't call her back.


  1. 2 scenarios...

    1. you are too out of shape to keep up with her.
    2. you have no sense of adventure (i would have loved someone a little more free spirited like her when I was dating, being a little hippy).

  2. 3. He was in shape, had a solid sense of adventure, but realized that running after someone who comes across as insane would not be the wisest use of his time. Team OP.

    1. Have you ever been anything but team OP? Does this mean you only accept stories on this site if you agree with the poster? It would probably make for a more interesting site if we could also see the other ones. Not that I don't love it the way it is... Just saying.

      I am with the OP on this story, though. She went running, and fast. Even if he could have caught up with her, why should he run after a girl on a first date?

    2. I only accept stories on the site that I think readers will find entertaining. Additionally, there are plenty of times wherein I do not take a side, or think that the OP was more of a bad date, but I don't always advertise my opinions.

      Based on what I've seen, enough readers fall on both sides of the fence on enough stories to keep things as they are. "The other ones" to which you refer could be almost any story that generates debate, such as this one.

    3. I will attest to that - I sent in one a long time ago where I was the Bad Date in question.


      Also to append my own story, the relationship DID go on for a year after that, but it wasn't good. It was all downhill from about the end of February onward.

  3. I think she sounds crazy, but I also think it's kind of rude to go to a restaurant, order food, and start eating it during a date when your date isn't there. At that point you have pretty much abandoned the date (however justifiably) and it's not too surprising that she was annoyed.

  4. I think OP was a fatty and Nancy decided to exercise him a little (maybe to see if he had the willpower to get to an acceptable weight in an LTR, or maybe just because it's fun to watch fat people run) but OP decided that he preferred the soft caress of a bagel to a real-life girl. ;-)

  5. I guess there could be more to the story, or it could be a "you had to be there" sort of thing, but based on the story as written I think she was just being playful (if perhaps a little silly) and you should have kept up and played along.

    She set up a surprise and you went off for a bagel alone. Not cool.

  6. Wolfdreams has it right on this one, obviously the guy was vastly overweight and preferred the company of a bagel anyway.

    I mean, he can't keep up with a girl?

    'I went to a bagel place, figuring that if she really wanted to hang out, she'd call me. She did, not long after I sat down to my bagel.'

    Maybe he should have just waited a couple of minutes for a call, before he decided to blow her off in favor of tasty tasty bagel.

  7. I think I'd rather have a bagel than a wannabe Manic Pixie Dream Girl (or Boy, in my case).


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