Assuredly a Future Politician

Story Sent in by Molly:

My first college date was with a fellow named Vincent. He was in my first-semester political science class, and he spent a lot of time chatting me up before, after, and sometimes even during classes. He usually made me laugh, and so when he asked me out on a dinner date for a Friday night towards the end of the semester, I accepted.

He said that he'd pick me up at my dorm, and so I put on one of my favorite outfits and readied for him. He arrived on the doorstep right on time, with a bouquet of flowers.

I thanked him for the flowers and asked him, "Want to come in for a second? Grab something to drink?"

He replied, "Do you like the smell of ass?"

It was a curious question, and after a pause, I replied, "Not particularly."

He shrugged, pointed at the flowers, and said, "Because I picked these out of slave girls' asses!" He leaped at me, then jumped back, then ran away.

I watched him go, then put the flowers into water, then called him up. It went to his voicemail, and I left him a message in which I asked him what that stunt was all about.

I heard from him an hour and a half later. He called to ask me where I was and explained that he had been waiting for me at the restaurant.

We had never picked a specific place, and even though I didn't plan to continue with the date at that point, I instinctively asked him, "Which restaurant?"

Silence from his end, then he replied, "I guess it would help for you to know that, huh?" He hung up on me.

He ignored me for the rest of the semester, which at that point, was only another two weeks. I'm not sure what went through his head, and I've still yet to figure it out.


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