You Said You Wanted an Inventive Man

Email Sent in by Bianca:

You are a true lady. I can tell. You know what's what! I can use a woman like you. See, I have invented and built a contraption that requires a woman as its missing ingredient! I have the bed, the sweet lovin, and SPERM. All I need is a woman who knows the time of day. I have a suspicion that this is you! What do you say???



  1. All I know is that I want nothing to do with this contraption...

  2. These types of messages crack me up; they strike me as so juvenile... like the senders are literally high-school kids, and maybe not even HS at that. Guys, if you can make a girl feel comfortable, make her laugh, or find actual things in common to bond over, you are a ways into getting what you want, and you can skip the cheesy b.s.

  3. David Parker Ray's Ghost, is that you?

  4. Don't worry, Howie. I had a friend once who did very well with women. He always joked that it all led to him lasting five minutes in the sack but that was good enough for him, lmao. I wouldn't know about that particular problem though :p

  5. 5 MINUTES! I can do it twice in that time frame!!

  6. Howie I had a friend that used to always say his penis may be small, but he had a tongue like an elephant and could breath through his ears. Perhaps you could expand your skill base ;-)

    Also, sorry Leon, but I don't think your wang and possibly a cardboard tube count as a contraption.

  7. Wasn't there a movie like this once? Burn After Reading?

    Strange man SPERM, oh goodie!


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