Every Dog Has His Date

Emails Sent in by Reagan:

Hello again Reagan.

It has been two days since I have heard from you. I hope you're not dead, since that's the only reason I can imagine for you not writing me back sooner.

I imagine that you were writing me back, but that a team of escaped bulldogs (from the bulldog zoo) happened upon you and thought your chest cavity a place of refuge. They tore into you (don't worry you died quickly) nourished themselves on your meats, and thusly prevented you from writing me back. Or perhaps you actively chose to not write me back for a mysterious reason. You'd better hope it was the former explanation, then.

Is that what happened? Unless I hear back from you, then I will assume so.

Henry

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Reagan Responds:

Dear Henry:

I'm one of the bulldogs who killed Reagan. Sorry.

We won't be coming after you, as we avoid eating people who are filled with shit.

Woof, bark, bark!
Spike