But Can You Heal Snozberries?

Profile Sent in by Andrew:

I'm really good at:

I am always my friends' first choice to go fruit picking with because I always pick amazing fruit. Apple picking especially. Ruined fruit turns beautiful when I hold it in my hands. I cannot explain it I believe it is a gift from God. I simply take the fruit lovingly in my hands and whisper close to it and it heals any bruise. I'm not making this up.

Last year a friend of mine's 3 year old stepped on a bushel of strawberries that they didn't want the 3 year old asshole to step on. I took the entire bushel in my hands, whispered, held them to the sky, and when I took my hands down they had healed… I didn't want to give the asshole the strawberries but my friend gave him some. Different life outlooks I guess, lol.


  1. It's like a floral version of The Green Mile!

  2. Not only batshit, but also called a 3 year old an asshole...wow, what a catch!

  3. Look, I'm not defending this woman's obvious insanity, but 3-year olds CAN be assholes. I hate when people defend kids no matter how bratty their behavior is. You don't do them any favors that way - all you do is turn them into spoiled assholes unprepared for the cold slap of reality.

  4. Sorry, nope--being an 'asshole' is a something a three-year-old can't aspire to, 'cause they have no understanding. They can be brats, spoiled, obnoxious, and are all little savages who must be civilized(and too many parents don't), but 'asshole' ought to be reserved for those who should know better.

  5. So being an obnoxious spoiled brat doesn't qualify one for "asshole" status? Sorry, I must have been using the wrong dictionary.

    Just out of curiousity though, you seem to imply that it's OK for kids because they "don't know better." How are they supposed to LEARN to know better if you don't punish them for bad behavior? For that matter, how are ADULTS supposed to learn to know better if you don't punish them for bad behavior?

    Somehow I'm just failing to see the difference here. Make it visible to me!

  6. "So being an obnoxious spoiled brat doesn't qualify one for "asshole" status? Sorry, I must have been using the wrong dictionary."

    Not if you're three years old Wolfdreams!

    In the case of a 3 year old running around and generally misbehaving it's the PARENTS that are the assholes for not doing anything to rein in their kid/discipline him/remove him from the situation/whatever.

    3 year olds must LEARN to behave and if the parents don't teach them that then they are the assholes. Unfortunately there are too many parents these days letting their kids get away with murder because they're afraid that 'discipline' is equivilent to 'crushing their self esteem'

    The truth is children need boundaries and when parents aren't providing them that's not the kid's fault. It's the parent's job to teach them.

  7. who leaves strawberries where they can be stepped on? By three year olds or otherwise. Also, what's with the apple picking? A dozen stories on here refer to apple picking as a past time! Right up there with the "let's have dinner and go camping!" first date stories that I find utterly baffling!


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