Proof That Online Dating is Masochism

Profile Sent in by Emmy:

About me

Prison time is hard.  Writing me an email is easy.

Root canals are hard.  Sending me a quick message is easy!

Pumping out babies is hard.  Messaging me is a cinch!

I am much easier and pleasurable than any of these tasks!  Why the hell aren't you women messaging me or messaging me back?  Are you saying that you'd rather have a root canal, go to prison, or have lots of babies than even write me "hello?"  Or maybe all at once!  A root canal while having a baby in prison is a stupid life choice and it is one that you make every day that you do not message me.  Why experience the pain?


  1. *editions, becuz i tipe Engilsh gud.

  2. No worries, Maxwell... writing good English is hard - messaging ^ dude ^ up there is easy.

  3. I like this message. I'd send him a "hello" email and I'm not gay! I promise!

  4. It is undoubtedly true that I'd rather go on a date than to prison. Same goes for pumping out babies. Jury's still out on the root canal.


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