12/10/2010

Why I Despise Guessing Games

Story Submitted by Kendra:

When I was 20, I was rebounding after a bad breakup and made some bad decisions. The biggest of these was going out with Wesley.

Wesley was ten years older than I was, worked part time at a grocery store and part time at a bank. He was a big guy, tall, and told me everything that I didn't even know that I wanted to hear.

Our first date (dinner and a movie) began so well, in retrospect probably because I had already decided that I liked him before we even went out.

We ended up back at my apartment, a little drunk and very horny. The bed, the removed clothes, etc.

Aside from clothing being mostly off, we hadn't gone far yet when, on top of me, he said, "I'm going to tell you three things, one of which is not true."

I tensed. I had a bad feeling about this.

He began, "First, I've been married three times and have one kid each from my first marriage and my second."

I hoped that that one was the "not true" statement.

He went on, "Second, I've been in jail twice, both for minor infractions that I didn't even do."

I really hoped that that one was the "not true" statement.

"Last," he said, "I can't stand you at all," then he grinned and kissed me.

I had a very bad feeling that the last one was likely the untrue statement. After the kiss, he pulled himself up and asked, "So, know which one is the lie?" He sounded very proud of himself.

I said, "You have to go."

He didn't seem to hear. "Guess," he prodded.

I slid out from under him and stood up, pulling on a nightshirt. "You have to go, unless you want to go to jail a third time." It was weird, hearing myself say that. I didn't feel nearly as brave as I was behaving.

He said, "C'mon, guess," again, and I turned the lights on and threw him his pants.

He gave me a look as if I was throwing him out after twenty years of uninterrupted marital bliss. He pulled his pants on, and then a transformation occurred, from wounded puppy to injured tiger, right before my eyes.

"You're a piece of work," he said, throwing his shirt on backwards, "A real bitch.  Why should I have to go? I didn't do anything wrong."

Oh no? Keeping such major life issues quiet until you're on top of me doesn't fly in my book. Sorry.

He made it as far as my doorway when he turned around and said, "You know what?  I don't want to leave."

Too bad.  I slammed the door in his face and locked it.  Good thing, because he went right for the doorknob and banged on the door.

He left after five minutes.  I didn't sleep a wink that night, or much of the next.

He hasn't contacted me since then (and it was years ago and I've since moved), but I hope to serve as a cautionary tale to anyone else in my position.  Yes, I was an idiot, but I was lucky that it worked out well, given the circumstances.

6 comments:

  1. i don't think this is the op's fault. she trusted a guy and he turned out to be a total creep. sadly, it happens, and leads girls to be more skeptical and less trustworthy in future relationships.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Guess which one isn't true:
    1 - I'm going to skin you and wear you around like a coat.
    2 - There are 3 other women in the basement, sitting in buckets of lotion.
    3 - Mexican food makes me soooo gassy.

    ReplyDelete
  3. "...leads girls to be more skeptical and less trustworthy in future relationships..."

    That wouldn't have anything to do with the OP's terrible character-reading skills, right? I mean, it's easy to always blame the "creeps" but the women giving them attention in the first place aren't helping matters.

    ReplyDelete
  4. If he has the face and personality to be married 3 times, but the character to be divorced 3 times and jailed twice I can't blame the OP.

    At least she didn't get string along for months and become baby mama # 3.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh piss off churro, it's not always the OP's fault. It was a guy she'd already met and they got along well enough to end up naked, and THEN he turned out to be a creep. It happens. One day when you're brutally raped by Mr Rogers we can all sit around and rib you gently about your character-reading skills. Good times.

    ReplyDelete

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