Something I'd Never Be Curious About

**Happy new year to friends and fans of ABCotD!  I have some new site plans for 2011, so keep your eyes out.  Thanks for reading and for sharing your stories!**


Story Submitted by Henry:

Neia and I became close online.  Her profile was one of the most dynamic I had ever read.  She had done Peace Corps work in the Philippines, taught at a rock climbing camp, and started a charity to provide impoverished children with medications.

Curiosity got the better of me and I looked her up to see if she was telling the truth.  I found her charity and her name on the masthead, so that was enough for me.  What I'm trying to say is that she came across, therefore, as someone who had herself figured out, and wasn't any kind of liar.

It was our first date and we had sat down at dinner at a nice place when she began with, "I got in huge trouble today at home.  Wow."

"What happened?"

"I asked my mom what it was like to blow my dad."

My heart might have actually stopped.  Neia watched me, clearly hoping for some sort of major reaction.  I mastered myself and didn't give it to her.

I asked, "What did she say?"

"She asked me if I wanted a demonstration.  I told her I did, so she called my father into the kitchen and blew him right there, in front of me."

I had to fight tooth and nail to not react.  Still, I couldn't help but say, "Why would you tell me this?"

Her reply was the logical, "My dad's dick.  Have you been to this place before?  What do you recommend?"

I asked her if she was trying to screw around with me, but she denied it.  My next question was if she had said it just to make the date end early for some reason.  Maybe I didn't look the way she had expected.

She reached across the table and took my hand.  "That's not it at all," she reassured me, "I'm just telling you about my day.  I don't want to end the date."

I decided to pretend that she had never mentioned a thing about her parents or oral sex.  We went on in conversation about this and that, her charity work, my work as a university librarian, and so forth.  Our dinner was served and the conversation stopped for a few moments as we ate.

Then, she said, "You can come over to my place after dinner, if you want.  You know, see Mom blow Dad and all."

I put my fork down, and all at once, I had remembered something that she said earlier.  She said that she had gotten in trouble when she asked her mom what it was like to blow her dad, but aside from receiving a "demonstration" there didn't seem to be a mention of any kind of "trouble."

I asked, "You said that you got in trouble.  What was that about?"

To the day I die, I will never forget her response, and I've included it here verbatim:

"Because I asked if I could have a go."

I smiled.  What else was there to do?  Clearly she was yanking on me.

She said, "I'm serious."

I said, "It's not really funny anymore."

She said, "It was never supposed to be.  I was just curious.  Wouldn't you be?"

Obviously, she wasn't very pleased with something about me or the date.  Either way, we had a very quiet remainder of dinner, and I did not contact her again.


  1. What a pearl of a story, and on New Year's eve no less. Might be my favorite of the year.

  2. This is Neia's father...I asked Howie to send a message for me:

    She got in trouble because of her teeth. I told her to watch the scrapping of the teeth..it might lance one of my warts. But, noooooo...she didn't listen. There was blood everywhere...it really ruined my night and the father/daughter bond we once shared. It was either that or when she asked me to kiss her where she stinks.....and I took her to Jersey and kissed her.

  3. You know, normally I *would* agree that this was just some ploy to get out of a date, but I can't imagine anyone who is such an amazing actor (non-professional anyway) who would be able to talk about that with a straight face. After following this blog for two years, I wouldn't be surprised if she really was that incredibly fucked up.

    Happy New Year indeed!

  4. revolting. stomach churning revolt!


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