Everybody Out of the Pool

Submitted by Carla:

The worst date of my life was also the shortest.  I showed up to the pool hall where I was going to meet Steve.  In the parking lot, I passed a huge pickup truck that looked like it was painted over with orange house paint and had a giant Confederate flag emblazoned on the back.

"I bet that's Steve's," I joked to myself, not being serious.

Once I was inside the hall, Steve's second question to me (after, "Why'd you dress like a teacher?") was, "Did you see my truck?"

His third question involved a bag of a white powdery substance.

"No thanks," I told him, "It's all yours."

He shook his head and said, "I've already had two lines.  I see God after three."

He winked and picked up a pool cue.  We played some pool, then out of nowhere, he told me to "Check it out," and broke his cue in half over his knee.

I was uncomfortable and thoroughly done with this date.  I sat him down, told him that I didn't think we were a good match, he said, "Yeah, you'll be right back," and I left.

I wouldn't be surprised if he's still waiting for me.  Or dead.


  1. Let me guess, you met him online...

  2. Talk about opposites...how the heck did you two meet?

  3. I love that breaking the stick was the turning point, not the Duke Boys truck or the bag of coke.

  4. Don't you just love it when someone you just met busts out the cocaine?!

  5. Good for you for being direct, unlike so many posers here.

  6. You think he's still single? Meow...

  7. Awww, didn't you ask him what god looked like? Now we'll never know.

  8. Never happened

  9. You would not be surprised if he were still waiting, or dead. Does that mean you would be surprised that anyone would be able to move on with never a second thought concerning you or your welfare? The self absorbtion exhibited on this board is overwhelming.


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