10/16/2013

Mouth Wide Shut

Story Sent in by Dave:

It was a normal-seeming first date with Gayle. We were at a diner. I was attentive when she spoke, and she seemed into what I was saying. She was in the middle of telling me about her cat when suddenly her mouth clamped shut.

Of course, I first asked her if she was okay. Her mouth remained closed as she moaned and groaned. I asked her again. She seemed to not be able to open her mouth.

I handed her a piece of paper and a pen, and she wrote, My mouth won't open!

I asked her, "What can I do?"

She wrote, You'll have to order for me.

I told her, "I meant, can I get you some medicine or call an ambulance? How serious is this?"

"Very serious," she said.

I replied, "It can't be that serious, since you just spoke."

"Damn it!" she said, then ran out on me without another word.

I left soon afterward. Was it something I said?

10 comments:

  1. This one is simple. Gayle, tired of her eternal EVS, went to a hypnotist and told him to make it so that everytime she starts droning on about her stupid cat, she'll automatically "shut up."

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  2. She was the opposite of this guy but not the first person here to have mouth problems.

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  3. I think I saw her eHarmony video. She looked like a real catch. The proverbial cat's meow!

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  4. Thank you Dr Steve, I think your diagnosis may be correct here. As an alternate explanation lets look at the time I was on a very similar date. My date show no interest when I was talking about my pussy and I also immediately decided no blow job for him.

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  5. Steve and TryN2Fly, y'all are my heroes! :) Thanks for the commentary.

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  6. If you order the food, then she doesn't have to pay, because you ordered it. Its the logic.

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  7. @L.Toledo: I believe this also falls under the rule of silent people can't pay.

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  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  9. ..... "Cat get your tongue" is what I think she was looking for.

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  10. "Cat get your tongue" is what I think she was looking for.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41VUlIqqJMM

    ReplyDelete

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