Coyote Ugly

Email Sent in by Patrice:

Hi Pats.

You might wonder why I've been out of touch. It's because quite simply I don't know what to say to you. You are a skier. I am a landscaper. You like seafood. I also like it. You like wearing bright colors. I like imagining shoving you into a cave full of hungry lions where not even God could save you. That thought terrifies me. It may be best if we have a parting of the ways. Before I find a cave of any hungry animal (coyotes maybe around here) and do the deed I dread. Or maybe you have a better idea.



  1. Frankly Robert, you are a freaking nut job.

  2. This is a lesson to all you skiers out there (outside of the Olympics, is that a real occupation?), don't bang the gardener 'cause he'll end up wanting to kill you in an oddly biblical sort of way. He'll share a shrimp cocktail with you beforehand though so you have something nice to look forward to.

  3. Got yer cave right here, Robert. Shove away.

  4. I'll interpret this for everyone.
    Hi Pats, your crab infection is so out of control it's like shoving my dick in a cave full of hungry lions. Frankly Robert


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