12/06/2011

A Number Three

Story Sent in by Brianne:

I was out to dinner on my first date with Rob. He had lost his job some time ago as a middle manager in the corporate office of a retail clothing sales company, and had since then worked at a Mexican food chain to make ends meet.

After hearing a bit about his life story leading up to his most recent job, I asked him, "Are you searching for a different job?"

"Than the one I have now? What do you think? I used to pull in low six-figures a year."

"What are you looking for?" I asked, which I thought was a valid follow-up question.

He gave me a dark look and said, "Are you judging me?"

"No."

"Don't you judge me."

"I'm not."

He took a big swig of beer. "My ex judged me all the time. 'When are you going to get off your lazy ass and find a real job?' 'You smell like Mexican cheese.' 'I'm tired of dating a burrito salesman.'"

"It sounds like she had trouble sympathizing. I'm sure you're looking hard."

"I am," he said, then downed more beer, "She judged me up until the day I punched a few of her teeth out."

My breath stopped, my heartbeat slammed into my ribcage. He went on, "Got a court date, a restraining order, and a big lawsuit. That's all over now, but hey," he downed more beer and winked at me, "It sure as hell shut her up."

I put $5 on the table to pay for my drink and left that very moment.

He wrote me a few texts, each drunker than the last: "Where did you go?" "Must be a long trip to the bathroom… number one, number two? Number three??? Call me." "Am I just talking to a black hole here? Where you are you?"

I'm at least grateful that he pulled out his baggage on the first date. I wouldn't have wanted to find out the same way his ex did.

3 comments:

  1. Good for you for actually LEAVING.
    Some people don't seem to understand that getting up and walking out IS an option.

    Good thing he didn't try to follow you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. What boggles the mind is not only that he committed this act of violence, but that he actually JOKED about it... ie, he's so far removed from normality that in his mind, knocking her teeth out was a perfectly reasonable thing to do and he can't fathom how the OP wouldn't get that.

    Hopefully he'll get jail time on his court date and will have a chance to reflect on his treatment of women when his cellmate makes him pretend to be one.

    ReplyDelete
  3. @ Wolfdreams, unfortunately, he said it's all over now, so I would presume the court date happened and he didn't get jail time for it.

    ReplyDelete

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