10/04/2011

Foosball Is for the Devil!

Profile Sent in by David:

About me:

If you are reading this then congratulations! I can't wait to hear all about you! I'm a dentist who really enjoys to go out on adventures as much as I enjoy quiet evenings in. You probably like one or the other or both of them like me so what are you waiting for.

I don't like sports too much. My ex was really into sports and he made me watch them. If you like sports too that's okay but we have to set some ground rules. Number 1: if we watch sports for two hours, then you have to do two hours of something of my choosing once a week. Those things can be housework, watching the kids, driving me to wherever I want to go, or thenceforth. If I have to sit and watch a bunch of guys in Dallas kick a pigskin around for 2+ hours then I don't think this is too much to ask.

No there are no exceptions to this policy. I don't care if you are busy or have work or even are sleeping. If football won't change for me, I don't see why you shouldn't have to work your schedule around mine. Don't like it? Good luck finding someone else to help you watch sweaty guys running around for two+ hours.

Also no cheering for football teams and don't hang their pennants around my apartment. Unless the team is paying rent there. If you do then I will ask you to chip in for one extra person for each piece of sporting crap you put up. You are not and will never be a professional sports player so why should we have Jon Elway and John McFadden or whatever his name is up around the house? Grow up!!!!

16 comments:

  1. Harken ye wenches and cads, thenceforth thou shouldst consult dictionary.com or similar whilst composing thine online dating profiles.

    So it has been said, so let it be.

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  2. Hell, I'm tempted to post the last three paragraphs (edited for grammar) to my own profile. Sports nuts = look elsewhere. Really.

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  3. I'm about 95% on the this chick's side. The 5% that is crazy is where she says that you have to do what she wants even if you're at work or sleeping. OK, also the part about what she might ask of you is 'watching the kids', that makes a lot of assumptions pre-relationship. But generally, if one person is going to block out large amounts of time to do something the other person finds boring, then yeah, there should be a roughly equal willingness to do things the other person likes.

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  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    1. The guy might make her watch. My ex had me watching him play video games for like an hour at a time. I guess that's a little bit different. IDK

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  5. Rules #2 - You must place your own balls into a vice to have them crushed by me. I've already done you the favor of crushing your dreams and hopes of happiness, it's the least you can do.

    Go Chargers.

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  6. so yeah, when the Giants are on, my wife will usually watch something else in another room. I would never force her to watch a game, nor would she ever let me force her.

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  7. I'm totally with the girl who posted this. As I've said before (although probably not here): why would I care about a bunch of guys I don't know, who are in a place I've never been, throwing around a ball I can't control? How can the outcome of their game - which has no effect on my life - possibly be important to me?

    Then the nurses bring me my meds and I calm down...

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  8. That girl's a total bitch. You don't want to watch the game, then don't f'in watch it.

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  9. She's still hung up on her ex and working on her rage. She's clearly not over him and his sports fanmanship.

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  10. I love sports, during the game is the best time to run errands. There's rarely a crowd at the grocery store, and no lines at the bank!

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  11. ^That's a pretty good system you've got there.

    On topic, not caring about sports myself, I can understand where this girl is coming from, but she is taking it to a totally unnecessary level.

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  12. I bet OP wouldn't touch a non-sports-nut, she'd have nothing to whine about.

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  13. I love football! I'm not a "sports nut," as I only like this one sport, but when Scientist Fiance wants to watch hockey (Go Caps!) or baseball (he's an Orioles fan...*sigh*), I either go do something else or sit there with him and do something else. He can hoot and holler and wear tee shirts and jerseys, and I don't care. I'm not going to sit there and be a cunt about it and then make him do stupid shit he hates to do to compensate for it.

    When we watch football together, I scream and holler and get drunk and high-five and wear an outfit and generally act out of control. (Ask Agnes.) If you don't wanna watch football with me, then gtfo on Sundays during the season. You won't break my heart.

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    Replies
    1. Sometimes you say awesome stuff. This is one of those times.

      Delete

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