8/21/2011

My Name Is What? My Name Is What?

Story Sent in by Tricia:

Andrew introduced himself to me in public, for which I have to give him credit for confidence. I was sitting and reading in a park when he came up to me (as he was walking his dog) and said, "Hi, I'm Andrew. This is my second time passing you, and I wouldn't have forgiven myself if I didn't stop to say hi."

He and I had a very pleasant chat, and I even gave him my number. He called me later that night and asked me out to a proper date the following weekend. I told him yes, and we made definite plans.

About three or four days later, I was in the park again and sat in a different spot. Andrew, walking his dog, came up to me again and before I could say a word, he said, "Hi, I'm Andrew. This is my second time passing you, and I wouldn't have forgiven myself if I didn't stop to say hi."

Maybe it was because I had sunglasses on this time and I didn't before. When I took them off to show him my puzzled look, he gasped, hit his head with the palm of his hand, and said, "Oh, crap. I swear I don't do this all the time. I–you should be complimented that I came up to you a second time. Duh. I'm sorry."

"Uh-huh," I said with a smirk. He was a dope, but a sincere dope. We hadn't even gone on one date yet, so I had no real reason to be jealous. However, it did up his creep factor a bit, so one way or the other, he'd have his work cut out for himself on our first date.

The next day, I was in the park again (I was on summer vacation, after all) and once more, Andrew came up to me with his dog. Before my eyes, he looked at me as if he had never seen me before and said, "Hi, I'm Andrew. This is my second time passing you, and I wouldn't have forgiven myself if I didn't stop to say hi."

I removed my sunglasses again and said, "Andrew, do you seriously not remember me? Or is this some sort of joke?"

He said, "Right. You're Tricia. I remember. Did we have a date scheduled for this weekend?"

I replied, "No."

He said, "Oh. You sure?"

"Yes."

He nodded and said, "Okay."

Then, he stared at me until I said, "I'm going back to my book. Please go."

He didn't say anything, but he did walk away. I didn't encounter him or hear from him ever again.

10 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. I once took a pick-up class (mostly out of curiousity) and they basically were all about this type of standardization - ie, have a generic pick-up line and a set list of conversational topics (which works because the pick up artist steers the conversation through leading questions). It made me very cynical about dating because my turn-on is cleverness, and once you've seen this happen, you quickly realize how sheeplike and trusting most people are. For example, it took the OP *three* times to realize the dude was a sketchball. Seriously, three times? Maybe it was a good match after all. :-(

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  3. Not really. The first time she appreciated his initiative. Maybe she also liked the way he looked?

    For the second time, she decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. After all, she was wearing glasses and she had the intuition to know that flirting can be a bit nerve-racking.

    And on the third attempt, Andrew learned a pretty valuable lesson in approaching women :).

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  4. Wolfsdreams took a class in pick-up lines? Not surprising after showing his true misogynistic self back in that one thread.

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  5. Look, Cory Ol' Anus, could you stop stalking me? I'm simply not going to date you no matter HOW hard you try to get my attention - even if it WOULD make a great Bad Date story.

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  6. Twice is coincidence three times is a conspiracy.

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  7. No wolfdreams01, I shall not stop stalking you, especially when you say the moronically stupid things you do like 90% of the time.

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  8. OK, but could you at least stop fingering your prostate while you type your responses to me? Not only does it severely lower the quality of your responses, but also your mom told me that it makes her uncomfortable to see you doing that kind of thing when she passes by your bedroom. 8-)

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  9. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  10. Hey, I'm talking to a man so into his own back door that he tried to sneak "Oil Anus" into his username. And on top of that he's clearly obsessed with me! Should I not be at least a LITTLE concerned at having an anal stalker..?

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