1/08/2013

Trash on the Bed

Story Sent in by Regina:

I was in a relationship with Will for about three months, and though we had gone out or hung out at my place lots of times, I had never seen his house or met one of his family members. In retrospect, it was strange, but at the time, I figured he was just someone who didn't talk much about his family.

That all changed one Friday night. He called to ask if I wanted to go over to his house for home cooking and to watch a movie. I asked him if I could pick up snacks or drinks. He replied, "No, but bring a gas mask."

He lived in a trailer that had two broken windows and was full of trash. He also had a twin brother, Craig, who was there, who Will had never before mentioned.

When I told him that, he said, "Yeah, I did," but I know I would've remembered it, had it been said.

I also understood why he had told me to bring a gas mask. The place was so full of used paper plates and takeout containers that it smelled like a city dump. There were hills and valleys of trash wherever you looked, including on the beds.

He asked me, "What do you want for dinner?"

"What were you planning to make?"

"Nothing. We're ordering in."

Unlike the fact that he had a brother, he definitely told me that I could expect "home cooking." I swallowed that and told him that we could just order in a pizza.

He then asked Craig what he wanted. Craig said that he wanted Chinese, and Will called up a Chinese place and ordered a bunch of things without asking me what I wanted.

All three of us watched some TV, and when the food came, I somehow ended up paying for most of it. Will and Craig tore into the meals while I was forced to pick at what I could. Will drank a lot and asked me if I'd sleep with Craig while he watched, and I told him that I wouldn't.

After dinner, I watched some more TV, awkwardly, while sitting between both brothers on their couch. Will went outside to puke a few times. Finally, it became late and I wanted to leave. By that time, Craig had already passed out, on the couch.

Will informed me, "Craig thinks you're fat."

That hurt. I asked Will, "And do you?"

Will shrugged, then started kissing my neck and giving me these weird, licking kisses all over my face. Without clearing much trash off the bed, we did it for the first time together, then he went right to sleep. I went to sleep shortly after him.

In the morning, we both woke up around the same time. He asked me why I was still there, then we did it again and he kicked me out.

While I wasn't subjected to the inside of his trailer ever again, we went out a few more times until he just went ahead and started seeing someone else without bothering to let me know.

52 comments:

  1. He sounds like a real gem. Why is it always the good ones who slip away?

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  2. The second sentence in your third paragraph could have been "I decided to high-tail it out of there," and this would still have made an acceptable entry. It also would have been a much wiser course of action.

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  3. Aww honey, you're not fat, you're just a floormat.

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  4. Wow, how unique, a girl who sleeps with a guy who treats her like crap!

    Good god, girl, get some self-esteem!

    (Unless, of course, you ARE fat... then you were right to take what you could get...)

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    Replies
    1. Wow, what a gentleman you are! I'm sure you get puntang thrown at you everywhere you go! *sarcasm meter breaks* I never comment on this site, but I just had to this time. I'm sure you think your little joke was adorable, but encouraging a girl to be sad and desperate like the writer as long as she's fat is disgusting. Judging on the 15 comments on this post ALONE, I'm sure you have a perfect six pack from sitting on your ass in front of a computer for hours on end. *sarcasm meter melts* You should check out Nice Guys of OkCupid on Tumblr. Your profile is probably posted there.

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    2. For someone with a sarcasm meter, you surely haven't a clue how to detect it.

      Jared, you better keep your fellow Southie hoes in check, bro...

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    3. Of course not. The sarcasm meter has melted remember?

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    4. That's why I don't buy Made in China sarcasm meters... They gotta be made in 'MURIKA!

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    5. Oh Steve, I love it when you rile things up. I remember the first time you got me. :) And for the record, I'm a fat chick into scented candles, so I don't think I could handle staying more than two minutes in a place that smelled like trash. I feel for the OP though. I used to be a door mat just like her. Didn't take THIS much but I can sympathize a little bit. Hope she gets some confidence and/or therapy. :)

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  5. Why in god's name did you stay with him after that? Jeeeesus

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  6. Ewwwwwwww i fear the op has real self esteem issues, not only did the trailer sound foul! But he lived in a trailer for one. And then the op stayed when he asked her to sleep with his brother???????? Wtf?????

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    Replies
    1. How does she know she DIDN'T sleep with the brother? They are twins after all...

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    2. Honey, I have real self esteem issues.

      I would never have sex with a guy 1) in front of his brother, even if he was sleeping, 2) in a bed full of garbage.

      Gross beyond words.

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    3. TWICE. In a bed full of garbage TWICE

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  7. I'm having a hard time believing this is rweal.
    Those last three paratgraphs are terrible, tyhere are too many points that make me think "What the hell". OP is either trolling us all or has no self esteem.

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    1. Yeah, I kind of felt that this was fake, but regardless, I relish the opportunity to bash OPs... waste not, want not...

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    2. That's what I was thinking! It seemed real, then it got crazy and I thought there was going to be a joke at the end, but there wasn't...

      Is this really real? Like, for realz?

      I cannot believe sex happened, or staying over at a place described as a city dump with a super creepy set of twins. WHYYYYYYY?

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    3. I get the feeling that someone is trying to get back at Regina and "Will" by sending in a fake story that paints them both as the trashiest trash that ever trashed. I'm thinking the OP has a big crush on "Will" and he rejected her/him to go out with Regina and OP is a wee bit bitter, so s/he's engaging in a little hate fic to make him/herself feel better. Methinks the hate-on is especially strong for the competition, considering s/he would paint her as a woman who would not only shag a complete pig of a man atop a pile of garbage but shag him *again* after he asked why she was still there and continue to see him. I think we can all guess who the "someone else" Will dumped Regina for is in the OP's feverish dreams.

      At least that's what I choose to believe so I don't have to face the fact that there probably really are people out there this gross and desperate.

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    4. That s definitely better and more probable explanation.

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  8. I also find it hard to believe that someone would send in a story that describes them in just the worst possible way.

    Unless they don't wee what was wrong with what they did?

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  9. Am I missing something? Is this a joke like the twilight story a while back? It's a movie and I don't get it? Yikes.

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  10. Is this story for real??

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  11. I sincerely hope this is in the Unreal Dates Hall of Fame, right up there with that one story about the girl who gave a scumbag a blow job so he would drive her home. And then protested that everyone would have done the same if they had been in her position (haha, "position").

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    Replies
    1. speaking of bjs as cabfare, where has that model of propriety, nikki, been lately?

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    2. I dunno, she must have her schedule quite booked, what with all the beejes she gives whilst wearing fuzzy anime character ears...

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  12. I really wish I could believe this was fake. Unfortunately, I have had waaaay too many friends who did this kind of thing, staying with scumbags who treated them like garbage, just so they could pretend the guy cared about them.

    Girlfriend, please, PLEASE, take a break from dating and think good and hard about why you're treating yourself this way. You are better than that.

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    Replies
    1. "staying with scumbags who treated them like garbage"

      No.. he keeps his garbage around.

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  13. I pitied OP. Then puked.

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  14. Please let this story be fake. If not, then damn, girl, you need some self-respect - stat! And to Steve: Dude, I hope you're hung like a porn star with a fat wallet to match with the dumbass comments you make.

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    Replies
    1. Steve is hung like a horse.

      Wait for it...





      ...a chunky horse.

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    2. Yes, because the silly comments I make anonymously on a humor website totally drive away all the quality females in real life. Thank God most women are completely shallow bitches who only care about penis size and money, right?

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    3. YAHHH!!!! Jarrod, you rock! :) Aww, Steve. You have proven yourself cool. They just haven't gotten to know you yet.

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    4. Ok I need to ask ... We need a recap about what Chunky Horse is about... curious minds wanna know ... :)

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    5. Christine, go to Search This Blog and put in Chunky Horse. It's the name of a story that has become folklorish legend...

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    6. To those of you wise to the chunky horse trope:

      A philosophical thought I've been wrestling with... Wouldn't it be so perfectly meta if the chunky horse story itself weren't real? It would be the perfect embodiment of chunky horsing.

      Delete
  15. This can't be real. She slept with him on a pile of trash, shortly after he asked if he could watch her have sex with his brother?

    Then spent the night? On a pile of trash, in a stinking trailer?

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    Replies
    1. And then slept with him AGAIN. And continued to see him, until HE dumped HER.

      Delete
  16. I totally bought this up until the end. There's been some real doormat stories on here but this one just goes off the deep end.

    If someone were truly this big of a sad, pathetic sack of low self esteem, I can't imagine (s)he would be self aware enough to even identify what a bad date is let alone send a story in about banging a hoarder.

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  17. This is a woman who was so desperate to be introduced to the One-Eyed Emperor, at any cost.
    No. Just no. Regina, you deserve to feel CARED FOR. You need to find a fellow who will treat you with R-E-S-P-E-C-T. A little RESPECT.

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  18. I have been reading this blog for a little over a year now and this post has provoked me to finally create an account and write something.

    When I read "That hurt." I remember thinking "oh, good she's leaving now. It took her long enough." Then I read that you had sex with him and I choked on my food. Then I read that you actually slept over, woke to him being an ass in the morning and then you had sex with him again! And on top of that you actually went out with him until he cheated you. I cannot even fathom the lack of self esteem.

    I really hope this story isn't true but I wouldn't be surprised if it is. This isn't to hurt your feelings sweetheart but despite the twins using you, you victimized yourself and you have to take responsibility for your part. Also, you should not date anyone until you become your own person and are able to assert yourself.

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    Replies
    1. That's actually a really sweet thing to say, kitty rose. I'm sure you are a fantastic friend to your friends.

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    2. I completely agree with kitty rose. This story made me physically ill, and I have a strong stomach...One of the saddest stories of dating I've ever read.

      Please, OP, do not victimize yourself again. No matter what is going on or has gone on in your life to make you think that you should allow yourself to be treated this way, it's over and you are more valuable than this.

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  19. Jesus OP, WTF is wrong with you? Signed, a chick with her self esteem still intact.

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  20. OP, you are the exact definition of a Gutter Slut. If this is how you live your life, I would suggest just getting into porn so you can at least get paid while being abused and disrespected.
    But you are probably too fat and full of more diseases than Magic Johnson's dick.

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    Replies
    1. Careful, BostonChick might take exception to the tone of your comment! One must always mind one's manner here on ABCD!

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  21. Is anyone else curious what kind of Chinese food they ordered? I mean, what kind of gutter slut doesn't like Chinese food, right?

    Seriously though, Everyone in this story is officially put in the DO NOT BREED pile. Save your future kid the cost of years of therapy and have yourself sterilized.

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  22. "
    In the morning, we both woke up around the same time. He asked me why I was still there, then we did it again and he kicked me out."

    And then she writes that she continued seeing him..OMG

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  23. How do people wind up with such losers?!! It's totally beyond me. A gas mask? lol...and the filthy mess in there...omg I would have never even walked in...Actually, I would never go meet a guy who told me to bring a gas mask...! Gosh...unbelievable!

    ReplyDelete

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