12/06/2012

Daddy's Little Oddball

Story Sent in by Justin:

Cathy was a blind date who showed up wearing jeans and a two-sizes-too-small pink t-shirt shirt with sparkles on it that had, emblazoned across the chest in size 600 Old English font, "DADDY'S 'LIL PRINCESS."

"So, you're daddy's 'lil princess?" I asked her.

She said, "Yeah, my dad's pretty sweet."

Cathy was in her late twenties. She even had a grown-up job as a messenger for a couple of law firms in the area. And she spent all dinner talking about her dad.

"My dad still lets me sit on his lap!" she boasted.

I asked, "Have you two always been close?"

She said, "Ever since I was born and he looked at me and said, 'Hi, daddy's little princess. I'm going to call you daddy's little princess.'"

"How close is your relationship, exactly?"

"As close as close can be... and closer." That's an exact quote.

I asked, "Do people ever get the wrong idea?"

She looked at me, at first as if she didn't understand. Then comprehension dawned and she stood up with her large purse and excused herself from the table. She walked deeper into the restaurant, toward the bathrooms, so at least I was mostly assured that she wasn't ditching me there.

When she returned, she was in a looser-fitting black tank top. She sat down without a word. I asked, "What happened to 'daddy's 'lil princess'?"

"We're not talking about that anymore," she informed me, and for the rest of dinner, neither I nor she brought it up. She was still personable, but the mood had changed, like we were talking at a funeral. Date number two never happened.

14 comments:

  1. Her dad was totes tappin' that...

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    1. Have I outgrown slang? I know what "totes" means, but i just can't wrap my head around it.

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    2. totally having sex with her

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  2. You probably did her a favor on that one

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  3. This lady either had a relationship that was too close for comfort with her father or she was a woman who was into that daddy/daughter role play sexual stuff. You dodged a bullet, congratulations!

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    1. Sidenote: There does seem to be a trend with internet dates who just spring sexual fetishes on people with warning. Anyone remember the leash with the guy in the dogpark?

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    2. Sadly, we all remember the leash with the guy in the dog park.

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    3. I like to dress up as Chunky Horse on my dates. You might say I have a Chunky Horse fetish...

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    4. I'd say that's a major understatement Steve. But then again, I do wear the back half of that Chunky Horse costume on your dates....

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  4. OP, you did pretty much accuse her of incest on your first date so, not too surprised there was no second date. That being said, her Dad was totally hitting that!

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  5. Our may be not. Why would she be totally oblivious to it? I think if something was going she's be rather anxious not to show. Or if she didn't care erhard people know then she wouldn't have changed her shirt. Being oblivious and then being troubled makes me think that she and her dad were just way post normal touchy feely w/o sex part. It's still weird and uncomfortable though.

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  6. Gah! My idiotic smart phone. Our -Or. Erhard-that

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  7. If your biggest competition is trying to get a girl to choose dating you over her daddy, get the hell out of there.

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  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

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