8/28/2012

A Clash of Springs

Story Sent in by Viviana:

It was a first date at a bar for Rob and I. We were seated on a long wooden bench that ran the length of a wall. Rob had a good sense of humor, and as the evening went on, I found myself wanting him to like me more and more. I have no idea how it happened, but we went from talking about our landlords to our apartments to our furniture to our bedrooms to our mattresses.

He asked, "Are you one of those Swedish sense-o-foam lovers or are you an old school springs girl?"

"Springs," I replied.

He slid away from me on the bench and said, "Can you show me how you sleep? Pretend this is your mattress."

I gave him a look. "You want me to lie down on the bench?"

"Yeah. Just show me how you sleep."

"Why?"

He leaned in and put a hand on my shoulder. "I just want to see. I'm proving a point. You'll see. I promise."

I really didn't want to completely lie down on the old bar bench. So I pressed my palms together, like in prayer, held them to the side of my cheek, and leaned over slightly, in a mock-sleeping position.

"No, that's not how you sleep," he said, "Show me how you sleep. I promise it'll be worth it."

He stood up, I guessed, to give me more room. I remained sitting, but I leaned over, towards him, on my side, kept my clasped hands in place as a kind of buffer between my face and the bench, then leaned over far enough to touch the bench with my hands. I meant to do it for only a second.

But a second was all he needed. He jolted at me and sat on my head.

"God, Rob, get off!"

He responded by applying more pressure downward. My hands were crushed, my face smashed against them. I could hardly breathe. I thrashed and kicked and I must have made my point somehow, because the next thing I knew, he was off of me.

I was up in a flash. I grabbed my bag and headed out.

"What?" he asked, genuinely as if he hadn't done anything wrong. "What?" he asked, again and again.

My face, hot from both being under his ass and from the embarrassment, didn't bother to respond.

The icing on the cake was an email he sent me that night:

4 comments:

  1. Nothing says "Adult" like sitting on someone's head!

    ReplyDelete
  2. First Oblivion, now Ice & Fire...showing off your geek-cred; I approve! :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Was his point that he's an idiot or that he's got problems?

    ReplyDelete

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