Story Sent in by Dot:
Fred was a friend of mine in high school. He asked me out on a date during junior year, and I liked him enough to accept. He said that he'd pick me up at my house in his "new ride" at 6:30pm on a Friday evening.
I dressed up and was all ready to go when he rang my parents' doorbell, right on time. I opened the door and he stood there with a brand-new, bright red Radio Flyer wagon.
"We're going to ride in this," he said.
I laughed. "That's your new ride?"
He said, "I bought it for tonight."
As I said, he was a friend, and we were in high school. I climbed into the wagon and he wheeled me down a block or so on the sidewalk before he said, "Whew. You're heavy. My turn to ride."
Insulted, I climbed out and he climbed in. He looked at me, expectant. "Well?" he asked, "Pull me."
I said, "First, apologize for calling me heavy. That was a mean thing to say."
He said, "It's a fact. We're going to have to take turns if we're going to get to dinner. It's just down the road. Come on."
I said, "No. Apologize, first."
He thought for a second, then said, "I guess I'll just wheel myself there, then." He then climbed out of the wagon, carried it into the street, gave it a running start, and flew down towards town, away from me.
He made it a few dozen feet before it coasted to a stop. He then climbed out, gave it another running start, and flew down the street again and finally, out of sight.
I went back inside and called up a couple girlfriends to see if they wanted to hang out. He texted me not long after to tell me that he made it to the restaurant and that he was going inside with or without me.
I was out with my friends when, an hour or so later, another text arrived from him: "Dinner was great. Where to next? A movie!"
He sent me text-based updates of his date with himself for the rest of the night. Finally, around midnight, my friends and I were on our way home when the following text arrived: "Now I will drive you somewhere and we will make out."
When I woke up the next morning, I saw on my phone: "The sex was greatest. More sometime?"
At school on Monday, he told everyone how our "date" had gone. My friends and I quickly set the record straight, and no one took him too seriously about much after that.
Story Sent in by Dot: