2/08/2017

The Price Is Spite

Story Sent in by Thomas:

While I was at dinner with Siena I realized early on that we didn't have much chemistry. She was really into snowboarding and not much else and I was into... just about everything but snowboarding. So we ran out of conversation topics pretty quickly and were soon awkwardly quiet for a little bit.

Finally she said, "What would I have to do to scare $100 out of you?"

I replied, "Nothing, since I'm not going to give you $100."

She retorted, "I know there's something. Name something. Anything."

"And you'll do it?" I asked.

She said, "As long as it doesn't put my life in danger, yeah."

I said, "It's a deal. There's a five-star hotel in the center of town. I want you to book out a suite there and we'll do it all night long. We good?"

She said, "Uh... that would require me spending money and sleeping with you, so no."

"But you said anything that doesn't put your life in danger."

She said, "Anything that doesn't put my life in danger and force me to spend any money or do any dirty act."

I said, "That's a lot of stipulations. Maybe you can just give me a list of what you will do for $100."

"Anything. Except for those three things."

I said, "And I'd only spend $100 on any of those three things, so looks like we're both out of luck."

Then she said, "I could've gone snowboarding tonight instead of going out with you."

I said, "And you still would've been out my $100."

We didn't go out again.

14 comments:

  1. Again, is it wrong of me to hate both of these people.

    Also, she could clean my house twice a week for $100. Or clean my gutters, or powerwash my siding. There are a lot of things I'd pay her $100 for doing.

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    Replies
    1. I found him funny. For her to suddenly ask for $100 on the first date is ridiculous. That's third date territory. He just matched her ridiculous and shut her up.

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    2. True, but straight to sex? Really? At least be funny about it.

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    3. Bananas likes men who solicit women for prostitution. She would have totally given him a chance!

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    4. I'm not a prostitute, but $100 bucks is a $100 bucks. Wait...

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    5. She kind of opened a door for it though... But all in all, I'm with Architect.

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    6. Don't sell yourself short, Bananas! With your low-mileage, shapely lips, beauty mark, and ethnically-ambiguous swarthy good looks, you could EASILY push it to 2 bills...

      And that's the closest thing to a compliment you'll get from me! ;-)

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    7. Also, why buy the cow when the comment sex is free?

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    8. Steve, always a man after my heart ❤❤

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    9. He's after something....but it ain't your heart.

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  2. Personally, I would have followed up his initial request with "alright... I'll sweeten the deal... *I'll* pay for the room... deal?"

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  3. I get so pissed when guys ask for sex on a first date. Probably because I have been in that position before and it gets old... fast. Then again I'd never ask a date to give me money. I just kind of assumed in 2017 both people pay for their share of the date.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't think he would have asked for it if left to his own devices. She was insistent on "earning" $100 from him, so he suggested sex to mess with her. At least that was my read on it. Whether he'd have gone through with it had she actually been agreeable to it is another story...

      And for you, Chrissie, I'd be more than happy with just a handy on the first date! :-)

      Delete

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