2/01/2017

A Bestseller?

Story Sent in by Lucille:

Theo and I met in a book club in a local library. He had some really good observations about the books we read and I was pretty taken with him. He was a bit older and a little awkward but I knew he was single and so I asked him if he wanted to go out sometime. He said that he would be glad to and that he had hoped I'd ask him out.

On our first date he took me to a charming sidewalk cafe and he gave me a wrapped gift. It felt like a book and I started to unwrap it when he said, "Don't open it now! Wait until you get home."

I wasn't sure why he wanted me to wait but I guessed it was because he was shy in front of me. The meal went well, we took a walk afterward, and he kissed me goodbye on the cheek. Altogether a very pleasant afternoon.

When I returned to my car I opened up the gift. It was indeed a book - a photo book, one he had made himself in which he had apparently gone to my Facebook and Photoshopped my head onto nude models.

I was horrified and texted him immediately: "WTF is wrong with you?"

He wrote back swiftly: "You already opened it? I TOLD YOU TO WAIT UNTIL YOU GOT HOME!!!"

Whether I opened it in my car or at home wouldn't have made a difference. He was still a mega-creep either way. I called everyone in the book club to let them know and the way I heard it he was unceremoniously told that he wouldn't be welcome back. What else was he expecting?

14 comments:

  1. Mega creepy Theo is obviously oblivious about crossing any lines.That would be just as creepy regardless if you knew the person well.Just because a woman shows interest does not mean she would find it endearing that you gifted her a homemade scrap book of her head on naked women's bodies.What woman would be wooed by that?What Theo did is called cyber stalking.Cyber stalking is against the law.Although Theo did not post the photo shopped photos online Theo gave the evidence to OP that he was cyber stalking her.Theo was lucky that OP did not report him to police.Op had every right to inform the book club about Theo's character which got him banned.Op's safety was at stake.If I were Op I would of got a restraining order against him.

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    Replies
    1. I think Theo thought if OP had opened it at home, she'd be excited by his artful editing and call him to come over and take photos of the real thing. He might have had time to get over to her house and wait outside, but Noooo....she opened it to soon. Major Creeper

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  2. He could have at least given her a more practical book. Maybe one that complimented her hobbies? Or a book that could be used on their next date. But no, he had to go with the bad photoshop album.

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    Replies
    1. One guy I dated gave me the book"Everyone Poops"as a joke.The book actually came in handy a few years later when I had my son.It came with little gold stickers with potty's on them.

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  3. Oh wait, so this isn't a good first date present? I guess I can stop all this cutting and pasting.

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    Replies
    1. No, it's OK Bob. You can still give it to me. Unlike OP, I can accept a compliment about my face and also many other lady's bodies.

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    2. this is more of a second date present.

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    3. These are both excellent points. I am getting my exacto knife back out of the trash.

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  4. This seems like the most practical way to deal with a reverse-butterface...

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  5. I can't think of any porn scenario that starts like this.

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  6. I can't get over the icky suspicion that he had planned to hide in the bushes and watch her open her "gift" when she got home...

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  7. I really want to say something snarky and post a few good memes, the usual, but this made me laugh so much I just can't even. I mean, I would totally have the same reaction OP did, but on the other side of it...

    Besides, Archie got all the good books already anyway. Damn deadlines keeping me too busy for memes.

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