11/21/2016

Some Like it Hottest

Story Sent in by Gabe:

Arianna's profile confessed that she had some sort of medical condition that made everything taste like potatoes. So when I asked her if she wanted to do dinner for a first date she said that it didn't matter where we went since it would all taste the same to her.

I took her to this Cajun place I liked, thinking that maybe the spices or maybe the smells would somehow crack through her awful affliction. She ordered something pretty mild (that wasn't potatoes) that first time and she told me that it tasted like potatoes but that it was a good effort on my part.

We were together for most of a year when she started this new homeopathic treatment that she believed would help her out. And wouldn't you know it, she told me that her sense of taste seemed to be coming back.

I was thrilled and she asked if we could go out to that Cajun place again. I like the place a lot and so we went there. She picked a chicken entree off the menu that was well-known as one of the spiciest dishes. She ordered it extra-spicy.

I was concerned and asked her if she felt she was ready for it. After all, if the door to tastes was just opened, there was more sense in easing into it than using dynamite on it.

"I have a lot of catching up to do," were her words. So I trusted her judgment.

When her chicken came she took a big bite out of it. At once she spat it out, drank down her entire glass of water, my entire glass of water, opened her mouth and fanned it with her hand, stood up, sat down, stood up again, and bolted for the bathroom.

I flagged the waitress down and requested a glass of milk (which actually helps in such cases) and brought it to the bathroom for Arianna.

When she finally opened the door she was in a bad state. Her face was puffed out, red, and she honestly looked like she was seconds away from exploding or melting. She drank down the milk and said, "More!" and I went and ordered another glass.

All told, she was in the bathroom recovering for just under an hour. As for her sense of taste, apparently it was back with a vengeance.

We're still together. But she only orders food mild, now.

9 comments:

  1. LOL. i feel her pain. I remember when I bit into a pepper, thinking it was a bell pepper and it was a chili pepper, and I drank down my whole glass of water and my friend's waters too and the waiters was trying not to burst out laughing. Then it wasnt funny but i can laugh about it now that my mouth doesn't feel on fire. spicy foods ugh. invented by someone really bored.

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  2. Since you're still together OP, I've got to know, does she ever eat potatoes? I thought she would be SO over them but then I got to thinking how familiar it must be to eat them and maybe she might miss the potatoes every once in a while.

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  3. Meh, this doesn't sound so bad... To Chunky Horse, everyone's soul tastes like oats!

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  4. I'm so fascinated by her sense of taste. Likely, she has an issue with her sense of smell or nerves misfiring to her brain. Glad she fixed it!

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  5. If you guys are still together: She lied to make herself seem interesting and didn't know how to admit it to you.

    Your first clue should've been "homeopathic" treatment. Water doesn't cure any illness.

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