10/08/2016

When "Not Interested" Is Too Tiresome to Write

Email Sent in by Robert:

Thanks Rob.

I wanted to thank you for the dates. I had a nice time. Unfortunately I was kidnapped to be back in Bulgaria and now I am packaged up to be a mailorder bride for someone in Romania (some rich guy) or a famous musician in Egypt. I do not know what my life now has in store but I hope I will be happy.

I hope you will be happy too Rob. You gave me two of the nicest dates I have ever had and they will be a fond memory always. The last time I was allowed to go on dates of my choosing will be my times out with you. It sucks that I am not able to see you again and that I am a packaged bride in Bulgaria. Maybe we will meet again. Here are the possible circumstances:

1. If I am with the rich man in Romania at least I will be rich and all my needs will be taken care of. If we're back in the states then I can ask my husband to see an old friend (you). Romanian men are known for being good to their wives so this is a good plan.
2. The Egyptian musician. His name is Djbwazi and he started as a famous street musician and now he is famous. I am kind of hoping that I will wind up with him because I like music of the ancient peoples all over the globe. Do you like music?

Sorry this is not the email you wanted. Know that I will be taken care of now and forever. It's dark in this box but I will be out in my new life soon.

Fondly,
Amanda

11 comments:

  1. Chunky Horse ordered another Chunky Bride.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Obese mares and mail-order humans fill the ranks of Chunky Horse's harem, but the one thing they cannot fill is the hole in his chunky heart... :(

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    Replies
    1. Hell's stallion has no heart. That's why he cuts out the heart of all his victims. But they never fit :-(

      Delete
  3. Can't you see? She's looking for a man worth a particular set of skills.
    (Wishing I knew the link trick so I could round this out, awww well we've all seen the movie. Not Rob clearly.)

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  4. All the signs were there when they went on their date, really. And who knows. When her mail-order box arrives in Romania from Bulgaria, he might not be what she was expecting.

    Anyway, her email was probably just an excuse to avoid announcing that she stays celibate for at least a year into a relationship.

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  5. I like Amanda. If one is to be dumped,dumped with such a tall tale certainly makes it easier to get over!

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  6. That was nice of the kidnappers to allow Amanda to keep her phone so she could access social media.And how gracious of Amanda to not call nine eleven for help and to just go along with everything.What a trooper!I hope her box is cozy and has a wet bar and bathroom.Too bad for Op though,the good ones are always taken...

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    Replies
    1. "I hope her box is cozy and has a wet bar...."

      *snickers*

      Delete
  7. With that imagination,bet she is a freak in bed. Hope she get the Egyptian.

    ReplyDelete

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