9/29/2016

Mouth by Southwest

Story Sent in by Martha:

It was our first date. At dinner, Joan chewed with her mouth wide open. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything but it grossed me out so much that I had to ask her (politely) to close her mouth while she ate.

She apologized profusely and then went right back to doing it like I hadn't asked her anything at all. I was really off my appetite by this point and so I stopped eating.

Rather than be observant and notice that I wasn't eating and ask me if something was wrong, Joan instead actually assumed that I was done and took food off my plate until nothing was left. She ate everything and all with her mouth wide open!

Then only when she was done she asked, "Was that too intimate?"

No, but it was gross. We never went out again.

4 comments:

  1. Animals chew with their mouths opened because they don't have lips and noses like we do.Their senses are also different.Humans on the other hand can chew with their mouths close unless of course there is some medical problem.Joan made mad,mad love to not only her food but Martha's food as well.And Martha wanted no part in that sexual sandwhich of crazy.My only conclusion is that Joan thinks the rules of society do not apply to her or that she is a horse,no relation to chunky Horse of course of course.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's an instant turn off if a guy or girl can't keep their lips closed when chewing. I want to see your teeth when you smile, not while you grind up your food. Sharing is caring, but that's caring a little too much.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Eating with one's mouth hanging open is disgusting, but taking my food and eating it without asking is a declaration of war.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Joan just wanted to be mysterious, and Martha was just a little too uptight to realize it.

    ReplyDelete

Content Policy

A Bad Case of the Dates reserves the right to publish or not publish any submitted content at any time, and by submitting content to A Bad Case of the Dates, you retain original copyright, but are granting us the right to post, edit, and/or republish your content forever and in any media throughout the universe. If Zeta Reticulans come down from their home planet to harvest bad dating stories, you could become an intergalactic megastar. Go you!

A Bad Case of the Dates is not responsible for user comments. We also reserve the right to delete any comments at any time and for any reason. We're hoping to not have to, though.

Aching to reach us? abadcaseofthedates at gmail dot com.