1/07/2016

Between Not Now and Never O'Clock

Story Sent in by Sandra:

I was at a cafe during my first time out with Chris. We talked about our families for a while. He was one of seven children and he droned on and on about how that made growing up a real challenge and how his brothers always stole his girlfriends and so on and so on.

After about 40 minutes of that talk, he said, "Brass tacks: when's naked time?"

"N-naked time?" I wasn't sure I had heard him correctly.

He explained, "You know. Time to be naked together. It's a special thing that a guy offers when he really likes a girl. Do you prefer top or bottom?"

"I... this is a first date."

"Do you want to wait for a second date? That's a bit unusual. Most girls and I do naked time by the end of the first date. But it's up to you. I guess."

Suddenly and excruciatingly uncomfortable, I said, "I don't think that's a good idea, tonight."

He sat back with a smile. "You on the rag tonight? No problem. Next time."

I said, "Excuse me for a moment," and I walked toward the restrooms, then beelined for the exit. I felt bad about ditching him, but it was really his own fault for being a dick.

8 comments:

  1. This gentleman graciously offered to postpone said naked time until a second date, or until a time when the ragbeast subsides. He even offered her the choice of position. Jeez, learn to recognize a keeper when you see one!

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  2. I wonder if that tactic has ever actually worked?

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  3. Well, he did get to the point. Sadly, that point was at the top of his little pin head.

    @ Steve - "Do you prefer top or bottom?" Come on, her choices were seriously limited there. This guy needs to watch some instructional videos.

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  4. "You on the rag tonight? No problem, next time."

    He's so nonchalant, as if that could be the only reason this girl would say anything but "absolutely! It's naked time!"

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  5. I bet he orders his steaks well-done with a hefty side of ketchup.

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  6. I bet he orders his steaks well-done with a hefty side of ketchup.

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  7. You know, just one time I'd like this to end with 'I said "I think I'm going to go now" and I left' instead of sneaking off and ditching them.

    ReplyDelete

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