5/21/2015

It Was 6,000 Pages of MAILER-DAEMON

Story Sent in by John:

I found Elenora on a dating site and we sent emails to each other for a good month before we finally went out on a date. At the dinner table, she handed me a bound set of papers complete with a shiny cover and professional binding.

I opened up the booklet and found that she had collected all of our emails together within, arranged in chronological order.

She asked, "You like it?"

I said, "I... yeah! A book of all our emails. Wow. Thanks."

She asked, "What did you get for me?"

I said, "I... uh... I was going to pay for dinner."

She asked, "That's it? I mean, I don't want to sound rude but you didn't get me anything personal?"

I said, "This date is pretty personal. What else would you have wanted?"

She said like I was a moron, "Something personal. Nice. Like this book of our emails that I made you. What kind of person shows up empty-handed? Clearly you just don't care."

I snapped, "I'll give you a nice sticker book, some crayons, and some glitter the next time I see you. Will that work?"

She gave up on pressing the issue. For my part, I enjoyed the food and paid for our meals. She didn't even thank me, but she did take that stupid email book back as we departed.

3 comments:

  1. Geez OP, sounds like you found a real winner there. She was probably your number one fan and everything. I can just imagine you two relaxing in bed together. She would have loved you forever.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm surprised she didn't get excited at the thought of getting a free gift of stickers, crayons and glitter. She seems like the type of gal that would like that kind of stuff seeing as how she made you a weird book full of your emails.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Awfully ballsy of your date, demanding presents on a first date.

    ReplyDelete

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