5/17/2015

Foster the People

Profile Sent in by Maria:

About Me

If you are looking for a man who will generate literal bedroom steam then you have come to the right place. I have made my exes so hot that two (out of two) have literally burst into flames while we were in the physical act of the coitus. It was only during their screams that I realized that pleasure and pain are together forever and inextricably linked. So how are you? I am a future world ruler with humble beginnings. My father runs a cardboard factory while my mother keeps fostering more kids that will inevitably wind up on the streets with murder on their minds. Where did they go wrong? Society will ask as we all shake our heads glumly. "In my kitchen just last week!" I will reply with a stern look at my mother. I digress. Any messages will be replied to and all questions will be answered. I am but a humble servant but do not wait long.

5 comments:

  1. I kinda want to date this guy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. You just want access to his father's sizable cardboard discount.

    ReplyDelete
  3. @ Nom - I kinda WANT you to date this guy just so you can post about him on this site!

    ReplyDelete
  4. If I were single, I'd so answer this.

    ReplyDelete

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